RIFTS Advertising Slogans....that never made it.....

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Mon May 16, 2005 8:37 pm

Cyco
Rifts: I can't believe it's not d20!

Mike Taylor · Unread post by **Mike Taylor** » Mon May 16, 2005 10:13 pm

Rifts: The Flamethrower
Ultimate Rifts: The Search For More Money
Rifts: The Many Deaths of LJ
Rifts: Dust Bunnies
Rifts: Don't Use All Our Books At Once

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Tue May 17, 2005 2:00 pm

Rifts: Books make great drink coasters for all occasions!

Rifts Characters: the other white meat!

Rifts: Our books Proudly keeping tables balanced since 1990!

Kalinda · Unread post by **Kalinda** » Tue May 17, 2005 2:14 pm

Rifts: the worldbooks are $20 each, the hernias are free.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:49 pm

Rifts: Where The Middle East and Jerusalem will be avoided at all costs.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:50 pm

TriaxTech wrote:RIFTS: Less controversial than the teleport thread.

RIFTS: Doom said 'Yes'.

Hey leave the TP thread alone! Your just suffering from thread envy.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:52 pm

Rifts: Rules Lawyer magnet.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:54 pm

Mike Taylor wrote:Rifts: The Flamethrower
Ultimate Rifts: The Search For More Money
Rifts: The Many Deaths of LJ
Rifts: Dust Bunnies
Rifts: Don't Use All Our Books At Once

but not as much as AD&D 2nd ed. and D&D (aka Hasbro's Kennels and Kitties) 3rd ed. and 3.5... where did D&D 2nd edition go?

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 4:55 pm

gadrin wrote:Rifts: Revised and Updated with the same Cut & Paste errors !

Hey at least the axe doesn't do 5lbs of damage

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 5:01 pm

Jesterzzn wrote:
Rolling Bear wrote:Rifts: Chicks dig it.

This one is still my favorite. And in that vein...

Rifts: If you can't get laid in real life...

eww but Rifts: Where your PC can have a relationship with a mutant animal and not be seen as a sick pervert, except by the CS who will shoot you anyway.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue May 17, 2005 5:05 pm

Rifts: Because, when we say it's going to be released this spring you have enough time to save up your money... since it won't be out for a year... or more.

cornholioprime · Tue May 17, 2005 6:26 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:Rifts: Where The Middle East and Jerusalem will be avoided at all costs.

Okay, Zer0.

Good one.

DAMN good one!!!

:lol:

cornholioprime · Tue May 17, 2005 6:27 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:
Jesterzzn wrote:
Rolling Bear wrote:Rifts: Chicks dig it.

This one is still my favorite. And in that vein...

Rifts: If you can't get laid in real life...

eww but Rifts: Where your PC can have a relationship with a mutant animal and not be seen as a sick pervert, except by the CS who will shoot you anyway.

Okay Zer0.

ANOTHER damn good one!!!!

ZEN · Unread post by **ZEN** » Wed May 18, 2005 9:58 am

Rifts: Buy this book because it has sold so many copies, it must be good!
Rifts: One rule for us, another rule for them.
Rifts: Proudly un-D20, because we just didn't want to.
Rifts: The card game and miniatures sort of flopped, but the rest is OK!
Rifts: Because role players should be able to have a ton O' books and well as a sack O' dice.
Rifts: Making player characters deader than hell since 1990!
8-)

Slag · Unread post by **Slag** » Wed May 18, 2005 10:14 am

Rifts: Where unorganized illiterates incapable of getting hired at Burger King can run a modern, technological-industrial society and defeat a city full of powerful wizards, demons, and dragons.

Rifts: Another day, another all-powerful multidimensional threat to the very existance of the human race!

Rifts: Where hand grenades are deadlier than intercontinental ballistic missiles...and have a similar blast radius.

Rifts: Fully detailing major cities 3 paragraphs before destroying them.

Rifts: Power Creepin' along since 1990!

Rifts SoT: More Deux ex Machina than JRR Tolkien's Eagles!

Athos · Unread post by **Athos** » Wed May 18, 2005 1:23 pm

Rex wrote:Rifts: Cut and Paste is way better than writing.

Rifts: Keep buying the books, and we'll keep the rules confusing.

Rifts: Your first session will be devoted to house rules.

Ouch, they say the truth stings the worst. Too funny.

The Beast · Unread post by **The Beast** » Tue May 24, 2005 12:15 am

HA!
I have one that beats you all!
But only because IT WAS USED!!!!!

Now then, back when Rifts was only up to WB4, my friends and I were in our usual gaming spot, just talking about nothing as we prepared to game. I picked up a "to be released" RPG ad mag (don't ask for name, it was too long ago) and started flipping through it, when I came across this full page ad from our friends at Palladium. The illustration for the ad came from Rifts: WB3, page 68. It was unedited. It also, surprisingly, was not for Rifts. Instead, it was for the Palladium Fantasy Role Playing line! Yes, I kid you not!. Not only that, but it was run a couple more times after my initial discovery!

cornholioprime · Tue May 24, 2005 12:20 am

Slag wrote:Rifts: Where unorganized illiterates incapable of getting hired at Burger King can run a modern, technological-industrial society and defeat a city full of powerful wizards, demons, and dragons.

Rifts: Another day, another all-powerful multidimensional threat to the very existance of the human race!

Rifts: Where hand grenades are deadlier than intercontinental ballistic missiles...and have a similar blast radius.

Rifts: Fully detailing major cities 3 paragraphs before destroying them.

Rifts: Power Creepin' along since 1990!

Rifts SoT: More Deux ex Machina than JRR Tolkien's Eagles!

Pretty damned funny......but HELLAFUNNY about the Hand Grenades and the Nukes!!!

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Tue May 24, 2005 12:31 am

Slag wrote:Rifts: Where unorganized illiterates incapable of getting hired at Burger King can run a modern, technological-industrial society and defeat a city full of powerful wizards, demons, and dragons.

Rifts: Another day, another all-powerful multidimensional threat to the very existance of the human race!

Rifts: Where hand grenades are deadlier than intercontinental ballistic missiles...and have a similar blast radius.

Rifts: Fully detailing major cities 3 paragraphs before destroying them.

Rifts: Power Creepin' along since 1990!

Rifts SoT: More Deux ex Machina than JRR Tolkien's Eagles!

Right on!

Kalinda · Unread post by **Kalinda** » Tue May 24, 2005 12:46 am

Rifts: When you just can't get enough high tech ****...

Rifts: we only said magic worked, we never said how well...

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Mon Nov 06, 2006 10:17 pm

I was trolling thru some of the older threads and saw this one lying in the dust. Though tI would bring it back, it had me laughing pretty good.

Rifts! Now with a fantastic new video game on a system you will never own...

Rifts! Did we mention there might be a movie someday?

Rifts: Contiwhaty?

Kryzbyn · Unread post by **Kryzbyn** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 1:28 am

Rifts: Wouldn't you like to be a Rifter too?
Rifts: We write the books that makes the baby Jesus cry
Rifts: Ain't your grandfather's goose-stepping morons...
Rifts: Not going anywhere for a while? (character creation)
Rifts: Humans...in power armor...are marching down the street.
Rifts: The game for the player who wants everything...
Rifts: Your mother warned you about this game
Rifts: Munchkin approved.
Rifts: We made Canada cool.
Rifts: Keeping stereotypes fresh
Rifts: Where it's cool to be human (or else).
Rifts: Now with more Backorder!

Main Rule book: $26.00
10 Dimension books: $260.00
3 Conversion books: $75.00
15 World books: $375.00
Having the budget to play this game: Priceless
or
Finding a way to carry all these books: Priceless
or
Finding a group that can agree on all these rules: Priceless

Kryzbyn · Unread post by **Kryzbyn** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 1:31 am

Cosmoknight armor: 1000+ MDC
Cosmic blast: 1000+ MDC
Cosmic weapon with force field: 500 MDC
Finding a way to take these bastards out: Priceless

Mech-Viper Prime · Tue Nov 07, 2006 2:20 am

Rifts : Home of a trillion character classes
Rifts : Where stereotypes are a must, ninjas, cowboys and roman legionnaires ,oh my
Rifts : Our vampires dont wear formal wear and kiss on each other.
Rifts : Home of Archie -3

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:45 am

Mech-Viper wrote:Rifts : Our vampires dont wear formal wear and kiss on each other.

LostOne · Unread post by **LostOne** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 11:39 am

Rifts Skraypers (or Juicer Uprising, Wormwood, Triax, Xiticix Invasion): Sounds like an STD, but we promise it's safer and packs more punch!

Rifts, more fun than cow-tipping!

Rifts Coalition War Campaign: When it's the game creator's baby, you know it'll kick ass.

Rifts: Our rules are scattered all over, we make the rules lawyers *work* for a living.

Rifts: We have pirates, ninjas and robotic dinosaurs, who could ask for anything more?

Rifts: For when your brain needs an enema to get rid of that not-so-fresh D&D feeling every other RPG gives you.

Rifts Juicer Uprising: Making drug addicts cool.

Rifts: Now with 50% more reprinting from previous books. (It's updated, we swear!)

Rifts: It's a made up game, who cares about Physics?!

Rifts Atlantis: A barfight in every pyramid.

Rifts Lone Star: Just let the dogboy finish with your leg, he has vibro-blades and is in weapons range of your goolies.

Rifts: Taking power creep and munchkinism to a whole new level.

Rifts: More classes than you can shake a stick at. More races than a splugorth can shake sticks at. More munkchkins than you can shake a splugorth shaking sticks at.

Rifts: We destroy more societies before breakfast than other RPGs do all day.

Rifts: Not my fault. I didn't do it.

Rifts: My bad.

Rifts: Still alive despite bad marketing decisions.

Rifts: Game balance? Why? Real life isn't.

King Chopper · Tue Nov 07, 2006 11:43 am

Rifts: Where your little Ion rifle can do the same amount of damage as that bus sized, robot mounted, laser cannon!

Rifts: I parry his sword with my face!

Rifts: Where the words "Meatshield!" is said far too often.

Pepsi Jedi · Unread post by **Pepsi Jedi** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 4:31 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:Rifts: Because, when we say it's going to be released this spring you have enough time to save up your money... since it won't be out for a year... or more.

LOL This one cracked me up. Love the Rifts stuff but wow. So true.

Rifts: Sounds better than "portals"

Rifts: The CS have some cool black uniforms.. if nothing else.

Rifts: Where a cat could be a dragon and kick you over the rainbow.... Be nice to all cats.

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Tue Nov 07, 2006 6:27 pm

Rifts: Aren't you glad we changed from Boomers?

Mech-Viper Prime · Tue Nov 07, 2006 10:24 pm

Rifts : play with us , because we are still the same as we were in the 90's, easy and cheap!

Rifts : because 1,000,000 copies sold cant be wrong

Rifts : why? why the hell not.

Rifts : Level the playing field between social groups

Rifts : did we say cheap and easy yet?

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 2:31 am

Rifts: a Post-apocolyptic world with an over population problem!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 6:58 pm

Rifts: Because Anticipation is Better than Reality...

Subjugator · Unread post by **Subjugator** » Wed Nov 08, 2006 8:46 pm

Rifts: A world situation created by the statement:

"What does this button do?"

Library Ogre · Wed Nov 08, 2006 11:26 pm

Rifts: Because Someone Has To.
Rifts: When you have too many kitchen sinks
Rifts: When was the last time you wondered "Are those sirens outside because our neighbors called the police about our in-character plans?"

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 12:40 am

Alejandro wrote:Rifts: The only post apocalyptic Japan that isn't terrorized by tentacle demons

That was just wrong :thwak:

...but Hilarious! :lol:

livewire · Unread post by **livewire** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 3:47 am

rifts: the other RPG

Mech-Viper Prime · Thu Nov 09, 2006 10:17 am

Rifts : the only game without an 20d conversion and dam proud of it

rat_bastard · Unread post by **rat_bastard** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 12:46 pm

Rifts: anything Goes, no really we mean it!

cyber-yukongil v2.5 · Thu Nov 09, 2006 5:53 pm

Rifts: we're like that slut back in high school, everybody's doing it, but nobody admits it.

Rifts: Meep! Yeah it's just that cool.

Rifts: Confounding Physic Majors since 1990

Rifts: and everyone else too!

Rifts: Come on! You know you've always wanted to play a Psionic Dinosaur from a lost ninja clan piloting an 80ft. Samurai Robot.

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 6:20 pm

cyber-yukongil v2.5 wrote:

Rifts: we're like that slut back in high school, everybody's doing it, but nobody admits it.

Good one...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 7:27 pm

Rifts: Reality---Who Needs It?!

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Thu Nov 09, 2006 9:02 pm

Rifts: Each book comes with a free pair of earplugs and a blindfold!

Rifts: Free with the three monkeys See No Evil, Hear No Evil and Speak No Evil

Rifts: actually written by a million monkeys on a million type writers!

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 3:50 am

Rifts: He's a Rifter, she's a Rifter, wouldn't you like to be a Rifter too?

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 3:51 am

cyber-yukongil v2.5 wrote:Rifts: we're like that slut back in high school, everybody's doing it, but nobody admits it.

Mech-Viper Prime · Fri Nov 10, 2006 10:16 am

Rifts : No half-dragon half vampire ,or 300th level ninja monks

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 4:32 pm

Rifts: Worldbook Next: -YOUR- Backwater Home Town

cyber-yukongil v2.5 · Fri Nov 10, 2006 5:43 pm

Toc Rat wrote:
cyber-yukongil v2.5 wrote:Rifts: we're like that slut back in high school, everybody's doing it, but nobody admits it.

come on! You know that was funny.

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Fri Nov 10, 2006 9:26 pm

cyber-yukongil v2.5 wrote:come on! You know that was funny.

True but you were just begging for that :lol: