Spluggorth Tracker and Registry

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Nov 16, 2006 4:44 am

Figures it's that rat Cupid again!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 16, 2006 7:18 pm

Winter wrote:I wonder what a sploogie would do to cupid if it caught one.

Pull cupids' feathers out one by one:

She loves me

she loves me not

she loves me

she loves me not

He's only got four limbs...but then, bilateral symmetry does offer extra parts to pull out...

But I suspect he's behind the slew of short-lived celebrity marriages that are inflicted on ALL of us...

So if you'd be kind enough tp leave something of the little maggot, at the cellular level, for me...I've got this industrial agitator of broken glass and battery acid that I can run an electrical current through, before I pour in the napalm...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Nov 16, 2006 10:17 pm

Here's a something I put over on the Sploogies starship thread. I'm posting this here, where it's appropriate!

How about Lunitoonicryth? The master of strange and demented bio-borgs and bio weapons.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 4:25 pm

Aramanthus wrote:Here's a something I put over on the Sploogies starship thread. I'm posting this here, where it's appropriate!

How about Lunitoonicryth? The master of strange and demented bio-borgs and bio weapons.

Okay...something officially WEIRD is going on....over the weekend, with our forums down, I had, at some point actually CONSIDERED an idea like that...

Which means, so help me god, that I may have developed some sort of telepathic link to this thread....(soundtrack from 'The Twilight Zone' starts playing)

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 9:40 pm

He is one of our Clones! :::a sploogie cackles in the quiet of a hidden bunker on our earth:::

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 3:47 pm

Oh !!@!!
That must be why I find myself constantly closing one eye and getting phantom limb syndrome when I have all my arms and legs(or so I believe!)!

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 10:38 pm

There may be a way to save Taalismn! We must take him out and get him really drunk! I mean blind stinking drunk. Then we tell the "Spanish Inquisition" about him. I mean nobody expects them! I'm sure they start him off in the comfy chair!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 3:41 pm

Oh great...don't you people know what happens when you get a Splugorth snookered and shickled?
Drunk, hung-over, red-eyed, itching for a cigerette?
I think the Horror Factor goes up 150%...

"What happens in Splynn, Stays in Splynn!"

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 9:03 pm

That might be an interesting trip! But also imagine the horror of it all! :shock:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 10:29 am

Argh!!! My allergy to schmultz is acting up!!!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Nov 24, 2006 6:23 pm

darkmax wrote:Marilyn Manson beat you to it.... argh....

Okay...there's evidence of a demonic invasion of present-day Earth in itself...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Nov 24, 2006 8:15 pm

darkmax wrote:I think even the devil shakes his head at Manson....

Now if a Driver's License photo makes everybody look bad....what does it do for Manson?

George Clooney or Cthulu?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 25, 2006 4:51 pm

darkmax wrote:Hmm... by his driving license alone, one can most likely scare the minor evil creatures into submissions while provoking an all out assault from the good guys.....

Who would think a geek will turn out this "flamboyant"?

Highway Patrolman:"I'm sorry 'Mr.Manson', I'm going to ask you to step out of the car...you look NOTHING like this license photo..."

OR

""GET ME A SWAT TEAM -NOW-! NO! MAKE THAT AN AIRSTRIKE ON MY POSITION! NAPALM! NAPALM!"

Okay...Goth Splugorth....that would be frightening....

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Nov 25, 2006 9:28 pm

Gets attacked by other Splugorth who mistake him for a Vampire Intelligence

"ARRRGGHHHHH! Lycorythh, I told you before; I AM _NOT_ A VAMPIIIRRREEE!!!!"
"So you say, you lying blood-sucking mutant maggot! I am not calling off my silver crab nano-crawlers until you're a dissolving pool of disassociating psuedoplasm!"
"ACCKKHHHH!!! YOU SUCK MORE BLOOD HAVING BREAKFAST YOU HYPOCRITE!!! THIS STINGS!!!!IF YOU RUIN MY PERFECT PALE PALLOUR WITH STING MARKS I'LL STAKE YOU OUT FOR THE ATLANTEANS WITH YOUR OWN VAMP_STICKERS!!! CALL THEM OFF!!!!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Nov 26, 2006 4:40 pm

Colore contact lenses for Splugorth...there's a niche market....

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Nov 26, 2006 5:33 pm

...and they sacrifice a slave or two to clean the thing....

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 6:08 am

Does that make Mansoncryth the Heavy metal sploogie?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 6:58 pm

Goth-Rock Splugorth...that's even MORE frightening...

Wonder who the rest of his band is?

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 9:09 pm

Just think of how much make-up he'd have to use!

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 9:48 pm

No, they don't use near enough make-up compared to the sploogie!

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 10:04 pm

You have to think of TONS of make-up for the sploogie Rockstar. Literally TONS!!!! :lol:

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Nov 27, 2006 10:59 pm

You might be right, now that I think about it! :shock:

Holy cow!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Nov 28, 2006 5:27 pm

Remember, Splugorth could also use Horrific Illusion for makeup...
I'd also say lots and lots of spiked collars and chains, too...
Maybe a head/eyeball cage if he's really feeling fetishistic...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 29, 2006 12:44 am

Eye cage!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Nov 29, 2006 4:54 pm

darkmax wrote:eye-cage?!

Head-cage...heavy collar with bars sprouting up to encase the head...The Inquisition and the pre-1900's slave trade and American correction institutes(as well as, sadly, mental institutes of the time).
Nowadays such items are of interest only to the historian or the heavy metal BDSM crowd...
Splugorth lack heads, so an 'eye cage'...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Nov 29, 2006 9:22 pm

That is what I thought you were referencing!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:53 pm

Recount:
Okay, so we have the canonical Splugorth, and we have specialized('themed') Splugorth...as well as a general body of Generic Baddie Splugorth(i.e. Cannon Fodder for Cosmoknights)...

We also have a new wave of up-and-comers who are trying to move into established territories and ideas and make them their own(techno-weapons, newscasting, goth death-metal music, modern medicine, etc...)

Any other ideas?

Anyone for Splugorth Theme Parks?

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 11:00 pm

You mean like

Six Flags over Spoolgie!

Spoolgie Adventureland!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 5:55 pm

"Man! That is one realistic Splugorth animatronic you got in the Funhouse! I almost went in my pants when I saw it! Great job, guys!"
"Funhouse? That wasn't the Funhouse over there....THAT'S the Owner's Pavillion!"
".........................................................er, dude, you know where I can get a clean set of pants?......."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 8:37 pm

ROFLMAO!!! I guess that would have been a brown trouser moment!

This is also a good time for the next ad.

:::Having trouble removing those troublesome spots from your shorts! Try Cosmic Whiteout! It removes those troublesome spots from embarrassing places. And if you have a smell to go with that spot try Cosmic Scented version of cosmic whiteout and your short will smell as fresh as they look!

Warning! Do not use Cosmic Whiteout near any extra-dimensional beings. They might think you are tasty and delicious. Also do not use if you any allergies to water as water will wash it out!:::

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 8:44 pm

Cosmic Whiteout...I can just see somebody trying to use that as a disguise!
(Appears as a white outline cutout among other people)
Instructor:(looking at gathered class) "Okay...who's missing?..."

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Dec 01, 2006 10:15 pm

But that's when you let the (dimensional) dogs out to chase him down!

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:50 am

Yeah, it might! But watch out for rain!

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Sat Dec 02, 2006 4:57 am

In the atmosphere! The only rain in space you'll run into is a meteor shower!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 02, 2006 3:04 pm

"Hee hee...easiest 'jack I ever made...OH SHI-PROMETHEAN NIGHT WATCHMAN!!!!!" :eek:

"You're my little puppy now...." :twisted:

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Mon Dec 04, 2006 10:15 pm

ROFLMAO!!! :lol:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Dec 05, 2006 4:34 pm

Well, they say the entire planet is temperate and lush...so unless they have a MASSIVE in-ground sprinkler system, I image they use controlled atmospheric precipitation to keep water cycling...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Dec 06, 2006 4:19 pm

Forget about tornadoes, typhoons, and other destsructive weather types...the Stage Two Prometheans probably just wish the stuff away...

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Wed Dec 06, 2006 10:24 pm

Maybe. But in advanced civilizations might be able to control their own weather. You know rain here and sunshine over there. No really bad weather unless the control system was messed up! (Hint to Tallismn for another story for OmniNews!)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Dec 07, 2006 6:53 pm

darkmax wrote:talk about predictable weather report... actually it might put a great many weatherman, and girl out of job...

You still have weathermen...they just happen to also draw in good money as Climatic Engineers.

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Dec 08, 2006 8:09 pm

What about a sploogie named.............

WeethrChnlcryth. He is owns and runs a company of planetary climate engineers! He's also owns a little OmniNews stock. (That way they have to broadcast his channels shows.)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Dec 08, 2006 9:01 pm

Aramanthus wrote:What about a sploogie named.............

WeethrChnlcryth. He is owns and runs a company of planetary climate engineers! He's also owns a little OmniNews stock. (That way they have to broadcast his channels shows.)

Enslaves a lot of Elementals and weather-oriented mages...sends in covert agents to cause climatic destabilization on planets(spread rumors of glopbal warming or imminent ice-age and glaciation) then come in openly and offer services to 'adjust' the climate...maybe hires out his Sunaj and other resources to perform weather-borne acts of economic terrorism on rivals(bad season of frosts wipes out a major fruit crop, pushing up prices...was it the planet's business rivals, or the planet's own government, hoping to hike prices on its major export?).

Known for his floating upper atmosphere 'sky palaces' and 'weatherdromes'.

Aramanthus · Unread post by **Aramanthus** » Fri Dec 08, 2006 10:44 pm

Also know for his extreme flatulence problem! His gas has changed weather patterns on planets before! :eek:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:10 am

Giant bio-engineered cattle belching out massive amounts of methane...sure to have an effect on planetary weather...combined with ocean-critters that devour carbon-absorbing plankton and keep the stuff from being absorbed into the oceans...

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 2:03 pm

The Weather Wars...
That torrential rain storm you just had was the openning salvo in a conflict to determine the future of your world!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 3:34 pm

Yep...that might be a sure sign that SOMETHING's up...

"Gee....forty televangelists struck dead by lightning strikes in 24 hours? Either SOMEBODY'S finally fed up, or there's something fishy going on here...."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 4:06 pm

Or never had it to begin with....Most of that kind follow the P.T. Barnum School of Social Philosophy..."Suckers; There's One Born Every Minute!"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:02 pm

Nigerian money-smugglers, Naruni weapons system service contracts, and T'Zee timeshares.....avoid them at all costs....

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 9:15 pm

ESPECIALLY do NOT get a house-swap vacation with a T'Zee family!

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon Dec 11, 2006 9:06 pm

Well, ypu can do things WITH them, just not -with- them....

Like crating them up and mailing them to the Splugorth, for one....

Hmmm...wonder if it would be worth the Splugorths' while to biowizard a T'Zee or group of them, in the process of draining them of their nanotechnology secrets....They could hop them up power-wise and reduce their fertility...or keep the high birth rate and make them more easily controlled...attractive cannon-fodder if a Splugorth doesn't have access to Kydians....