Alrik Vas wrote:Not everyone has difficulty reading human emotions and moods either. Communication is best but there are more ways to bring it about than vocally. I don't know why you are making this argument. I've already said responsibility rests with both parties, there isn't really much else to it.
You're right. It doesn't have to start out as a sit down "let's work out a future" conversation. If the player starts looking for storylines involving his reward, he wants to keep it. If a GM starts pulling the storyline away from the reward and the player shows discomfort, it's an indication he's worried about losing it.
Communication is best and does work both ways, but as the storyteller and plot-maker, the GM has the greater responsibility to not do irreversible destruction before ensuring the player is on board. If you're playing Monopoly, having the game owner take away your hotel simply because you landed on Boardwalk and Park Place is not fun. Go slow, steer just a little, and judge the reaction to that. Ask for feedback. If a GM ends up out of their comfort zone, approach the players outside the game about potential storylines that will bring the game back into the comfort zone.
In addition, both parties can make compromises, giving a little without giving up something cool. I had a game where Thoth gave a player a one shot use of Create Zombie. When the spell was forgotten, the player was really bummed. He didn't have to say it out loud, I could read it in what he was saying, what he wasn't saying and his body language. I told him to grab his character sheet and come to the side room with me. We compromised on his character retaining that spell but losing knowledge of a different spell in return. One high level spell is not going to destroy the game. The player was happy, which made me happy, because my happiness is largely based on my players having a good time and enjoying my plots.
And that is the one thing that should be remembered about all - everyone should be happy. Different people have different notions of happiness, but one person (the GM) shouldn't have happiness at the expense of the rest of the people (the players). Happiness should be attainable by everyone at the table.