Combating the Morlock problem on the SDF-1

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 11:39 am

28:The team comes across 1D6x20 female morlocks in heat
" RUN FOREST!, RUN THE **** AWAY DUMB ASS! " :shock:

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 12:32 pm

"Please pass the Brain Bleach[sup]TM[/sup]"

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 12:44 pm

SRoss wrote:"Please pass the Brain Bleach[sup]TM[/sup]"

Well they need to *thin out* their *thick * blood, many generations of inbreeding among the morlocks tends to make them *desprate*

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 3:13 pm

Just back the tankertruck over here...no, don't bother with the gallon jugs, I'll take it straight from the tap....

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 4:18 pm

taalismn wrote:Just back the tankertruck over here...no, don't bother with the gallon jugs, I'll take it straight from the tap....

Just like tapping a maple tree eh?, or...no never mind even that's to messed up for me.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 5:57 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Just back the tankertruck over here...no, don't bother with the gallon jugs, I'll take it straight from the tap....

Just like tapping a maple tree eh?, or...no never mind even that's to messed up for me.

During sugaring season around here I got to watch as a city-slicker was introduced to the fine art of maple sugaring...It's true about people not knowing where their food comes from, as this guy's initiation had to be one of the funniest RL conversations I've ever seen, and the icing on the cake was this guy trying to buy up all the available syrup in the park, and all foreseeable future production that season(and this was just a small 4h-style public operation, not a real moneymaking op). The guy had such a New York accent and mannerisms I was afraid the Manhattan organized crime cartels were going to try to muscle in and take over the maple syrup industry in Connecticut...

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 7:30 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Just back the tankertruck over here...no, don't bother with the gallon jugs, I'll take it straight from the tap....

Just like tapping a maple tree eh?, or...no never mind even that's to messed up for me.

During sugaring season around here I got to watch as a city-slicker was introduced to the fine art of maple sugaring...It's true about people not knowing where their food comes from, as this guy's initiation had to be one of the funniest RL conversations I've ever seen, and the icing on the cake was this guy trying to buy up all the available syrup in the park, and all foreseeable future production that season(and this was just a small 4h-style public operation, not a real moneymaking op). The guy had such a New York accent and mannerisms I was afraid the Manhattan organized crime cartels were going to try to muscle in and take over the maple syrup industry in Connecticut...

" Bah! you americains are small time compaired to how we do things up north when it comes to maple sugaring. "-Captain Paul B. of the 69th " Lumberjacks " Forest Division of the ASC

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 7:50 pm

Yeah, well, using .50 caliber machine guns to both drive the taps and drive off syrup poachers is kinda dangerous down here where we have a higher population average per square mile, and a heavy weapon with a range of a mile or so can catch a town in the overkill.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jun 02, 2015 8:27 pm

taalismn wrote:Yeah, well, using .50 caliber machine guns to both drive the taps and drive off syrup poachers is kinda dangerous down here where we have a higher population average per square mile, and a heavy weapon with a range of a mile or so can catch a town in the overkill.

Piffft that is small time up here in the Deep North we use mini Neutron-s missles to tap our trees, that's because the smallest tree is 1500 feet thick due to mutation from the Rain Of Death and is harder then starship hulls.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 2:24 pm

glitterboy2098 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Flamethrowers, Area of effect, for those hard-to-reach-with-direct-fire weapons.
that didn't work out too well for the Colonial marines on LV426..

Morlocks are hairy and not resistant to fire like a certain silicon based xeno life forms with pressurized acid for blood. Flame throwers would be perfect. Create light which Morlocks don't like, causes pain even if it's a near miss. Wont burn through the hull or hurt your friends in MDC environmental armor.

Morlocks being devolved humans have a higher self preservation instinct than xenomorphs who from material don't seem to have an issue with pain or sacrifice IF it advances the colony.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 3:01 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:
glitterboy2098 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Flamethrowers, Area of effect, for those hard-to-reach-with-direct-fire weapons.
that didn't work out too well for the Colonial marines on LV426..
Morlocks are hairy and not resistant to fire like a certain silicon based xeno life forms with pressurized acid for blood. Flame throwers would be perfect. Create light which Morlocks don't like, causes pain even if it's a near miss. Wont burn through the hull or hurt your friends in MDC environmental armor.

Morlocks being devolved humans have a higher self preservation instinct than xenomorphs who from material don't seem to have an issue with pain or sacrifice IF it advances the colony.

So light'em up. Smoke'em if you got'em.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 3:04 pm

taalismn wrote:So light'em up. Smoke'em if you got'em.

And don't get busted. :mrgreen:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 3:12 pm

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN HE-!?"
###FFFWWWOOOOSSSSHHH###
"Oops...whoever that was...overkill."
"...that might have been the ship's chief engineer..."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 3:36 pm

taalismn wrote:"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN HE-!?"
###FFFWWWOOOOSSSSHHH###
"Oops...whoever that was...overkill."
"...that might have been the ship's chief engineer..."

" Well since some one! BBQ'ed the ship's engineer we had better figure out how to turn off the fire surpression systems before we choke. "

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 4:08 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN HE-!?"
###FFFWWWOOOOSSSSHHH###
"Oops...whoever that was...overkill."
"...that might have been the ship's chief engineer..."

" Well since some one! BBQ'ed the ship's engineer we had better figure out how to turn off the fire surpression systems before we choke. "

Turn them ON. If they were on already, flamethrowers really wouldn't be effective, now, would they?

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 4:32 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN HE-!?"
###FFFWWWOOOOSSSSHHH###
"Oops...whoever that was...overkill."
"...that might have been the ship's chief engineer..."

" Well since some one! BBQ'ed the ship's engineer we had better figure out how to turn off the fire surpression systems before we choke. "

Turn them ON. If they were on already, flamethrowers really wouldn't be effective, now, would they?

What are you?, a Firebat?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 4:37 pm

Nah, just a firm believer in the curative properties of napalm.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 4:42 pm

taalismn wrote:Nah, just a firm believer in the curative properties of napalm.

Is that with or without a thermite chaser?

Either way I'm sure the Sisters of Cle Reptence would love to have a *quiet* *chat* with you.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 7:26 pm

"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 7:30 pm

SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

Bonfire of the Blamities?

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:13 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

Bonfire of the Blamities?

Either it's a hot time in the old town tonight.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:19 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

Bonfire of the Blamities?

Either it's a hot time in the old town tonight.

Welcome to Tinderboxville.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:21 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

Bonfire of the Blamities?

Either it's a hot time in the old town tonight.

Welcome to Tinderboxville.

" And remember to exstinush all smoking materials or ELSE! "

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:28 pm

"And this is what is called a 'firestorm', which is a short, wholly inadequate word for describing what is essentially HELL ON EARTH."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:31 pm

taalismn wrote:"And this is what is called a 'firestorm', which is a short, wholly inadequate word for describing what is essentially HELL ON EARTH."

IG Hellhound Sqaud:" If you can't take the heat go home ya p*****! "

Sisters Of CleRepentance:***Censored By Inqastional Order****

Chronicler · Unread post by **Chronicler** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 9:50 pm

SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

I see what you did there. (RE: WW2)

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 10:06 pm

Chronicler wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

I see what you did there. (RE: WW2)

If it's good enough for the US Army Air Corp, why not the UEDF?

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 11:16 pm

SRoss wrote:
Chronicler wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

I see what you did there. (RE: WW2)

If it's good enough for the US Army Air Corp, why not the UEDF?

The UEDF does not use thermite, they use cobalt limpet mines.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Wed Jun 03, 2015 11:52 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Chronicler wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

I see what you did there. (RE: WW2)

If it's good enough for the US Army Air Corp, why not the UEDF?

The UEDF does not use thermite, they use cobalt limpet mines.

"I might need a little more glue then."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 10:30 am

SRoss wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
SRoss wrote:
Chronicler wrote:
SRoss wrote:"I'll have this solved in a minute." (Goes back to gluing thermite devices to the hoard of bats he's collected.)

I see what you did there. (RE: WW2)

If it's good enough for the US Army Air Corp, why not the UEDF?

The UEDF does not use thermite, they use cobalt limpet mines.

"I might need a little more glue then."

Glue is for kids, molecuer bonding it's were it's at.

Chris0013 · Unread post by **Chris0013** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 11:07 am

Has anyone considered the the morlock problem and the shortage of meat issue could be solved at the same time?

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 12:08 pm

Chris0013 wrote:Has anyone considered the the morlock problem and the shortage of meat issue could be solved at the same time?

Not a good idea unless you want mutant tapeworms pulling a chest burster on your ass, literaly your ass.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 1:05 pm

Depends on what the morlocks are eating. If they're eating something the rest of the unmutated crew could safely eat, eating the morlocks is inefficient. If they're eating other people on the ship, it's even less efficient.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 2:08 pm

taalismn wrote:Depends on what the morlocks are eating. If they're eating something the rest of the unmutated crew could safely eat, eating the morlocks is inefficient. If they're eating other people on the ship, it's even less efficient.

Yep, prion based dieases are no fun.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 2:10 pm

Scientific cannibalism...it has to make sense by the numbers.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 8:33 pm

taalismn wrote:Scientific cannibalism...it has to make sense by the numbers.

Unless it comes to quantum pyshics then it's anyone's guess.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jun 04, 2015 10:29 pm

It's all about who to eat. :twisted:

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Fri Jun 05, 2015 8:06 pm

taalismn wrote:It's all about who to eat.

And gambler's luck that you would eat the right one, they don't call it a Meat Draw for nothing you know.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Jun 05, 2015 11:04 pm

Jason Lynn, 'Emergency Rations'....although Parkhyun may have disposed of him in an earlier misadventure.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Fri Jun 05, 2015 11:37 pm

taalismn wrote:Jason Lynn, 'Emergency Rations'....although Parkhyun may have disposed of him in an earlier misadventure.

You know you have no friends when your so called call dibs on your body parts in case of starvation to your face..

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Jun 06, 2015 9:50 am

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Jason Lynn, 'Emergency Rations'....although Parkhyun may have disposed of him in an earlier misadventure.

You know you have no friends when your so called call dibs on your body parts in case of starvation to your face..

"Don't do anything to reduce your love handles. I prefer soft foods."

"You ass is mine, literally."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sat Jun 06, 2015 12:51 pm

Security Guard: (Eyeing Capt. Tiberius) "That looks like some good ham." :fl:

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Sat Jun 06, 2015 1:03 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Jason Lynn, 'Emergency Rations'....although Parkhyun may have disposed of him in an earlier misadventure.

You know you have no friends when your so called call dibs on your body parts in case of starvation to your face..

"Don't do anything to reduce your love handles. I prefer soft foods."

"You ass is mine, literally."

Which would make most females happy. :twisted:

parkhyun · Unread post by **parkhyun** » Sat Jun 06, 2015 9:33 pm

Not sure who's eating whom here.
Anyhoo... I'm sure the morlocks taste great to stranded Zentraedi, who normally have to subsist on duct mold and Minmei dolls.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Sat Jun 06, 2015 9:57 pm

parkhyun wrote:Not sure who's eating whom here.
Anyhoo... I'm sure the morlocks taste great to stranded Zentraedi, who normally have to subsist on duct mold and Minmei dolls.

I'm sure the Zents would also enjoy an order of invid hash browns to go with their morlock bacon.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Jun 07, 2015 1:58 pm

Crab cakes. Invid are crab cakes.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Sun Jun 07, 2015 8:39 pm

taalismn wrote:Crab cakes. Invid are crab cakes.

Which exsplains why all of the Red Lobbsters where nukes down to the mantle when the Ivid came a calling

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun Jun 07, 2015 8:50 pm

And why stocks of garlic butter became as rare and precious as protoculture.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Sun Jun 07, 2015 8:55 pm

taalismn wrote:And why stocks of garlic butter became as rare and precious as protoculture.

That is true and under the Invid occupation anyone caught making butter or growing garlic was grounds to have their homes or twons razed to the ground and the unforutents of said homes and towns being used by the Regis for turly horrfiying exsperiments.

Chronicler · Unread post by **Chronicler** » Sun Jun 07, 2015 9:49 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:And why stocks of garlic butter became as rare and precious as protoculture.

That is true and under the Invid occupation anyone caught making butter or growing garlic was grounds to have their homes or twons razed to the ground and the unforutents of said homes and towns being used by the Regis for turly horrfiying exsperiments.

Regis: "Contrary to belief we are not crabs. We designed are mechs based on crabs of our home world. As for the Red Lobsters we only nuked them so we can corner the market on cheddar bay biscuits"