Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 9:36 pm

Ok Taalismn I PM'ed you the rough draft of the MCHS#69's staff, students and rivals.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 10:28 pm

Looking at it as we speak.....Scribbling a few notes, and I'll try to shoot something back to you tomorrow if I can get through dealing with the federal government and other RL issues.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 10:29 pm

taalismn wrote:Looking at it as we speak.....Scribbling a few notes, and I'll try to shoot something back to you tomorrow if I can get through dealing with the federal government and other RL issues.

Sure no problem, why are the Feds on your ass for, said something they didn't like*rolls eyes*

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Wed Jul 22, 2015 10:00 pm

Arnie100: "What's this? The annual 'Who Lived And Died' Staff and Student Body list?"
taalismn: "Yup."
Arnie100: "Huh...only half the school so far."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 12:20 am

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Looking at it as we speak.....Scribbling a few notes, and I'll try to shoot something back to you tomorrow if I can get through dealing with the federal government and other RL issues.

Sure no problem, why are the Feds on your ass for, said something they didn't like*rolls eyes*

IRS....I filed everything I needed to do, they cashed the check(according to my bank), but now they're claiming I didn't file a return.
The kicker is, the notification letter sez, after delivering a dire warning; 'Ignore if you have already sent in your tax return"...
And calling them to deal with the matter just gets me disconnected because 'we are dealing with a heavier than normal workload. Please try again later'.
I was already dealing with the IRS decision NOT to mail out tax forms, or even send them to the public libraries(leading to people blaming us, or wondering why we didn't print out, at library expense, 50+ page tax booklets on demand, and the backlog of ordering direct from the IRS.....

On the other hand, when I had to dispose of my old car and waited in a long DMV line for a replacement certificate of title, I learned my old junker was so ancient it didn't NEED a title for transfer or disposal...1 hour line wait....45 second answer, and I was out the door. I'm really hoping this will be a similar case of 'Oops. we accidentally panicked you with an erroneous mailing', because if not, then somebody made off with my tax payment....

Bah! Enough!

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 9:23 am

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:Looking at it as we speak.....Scribbling a few notes, and I'll try to shoot something back to you tomorrow if I can get through dealing with the federal government and other RL issues.

Sure no problem, why are the Feds on your ass for, said something they didn't like*rolls eyes*

IRS....I filed everything I needed to do, they cashed the check(according to my bank), but now they're claiming I didn't file a return.
The kicker is, the notification letter sez, after delivering a dire warning; 'Ignore if you have already sent in your tax return"...
And calling them to deal with the matter just gets me disconnected because 'we are dealing with a heavier than normal workload. Please try again later'.
I was already dealing with the IRS decision NOT to mail out tax forms, or even send them to the public libraries(leading to people blaming us, or wondering why we didn't print out, at library expense, 50+ page tax booklets on demand, and the backlog of ordering direct from the IRS.....

On the other hand, when I had to dispose of my old car and waited in a long DMV line for a replacement certificate of title, I learned my old junker was so ancient it didn't NEED a title for transfer or disposal...1 hour line wait....45 second answer, and I was out the door. I'm really hoping this will be a similar case of 'Oops. we accidentally panicked you with an erroneous mailing', because if not, then somebody made off with my tax payment....

Bah! Enough!

Oh man I feel for you, I have to wonder if the UEG's taxmen are as *effective*as the IRS, I don't drive as I really can't relate to you DMV exprences other thenit seems like what ever god or gods if any seem to take a sick enjoyment in wasting your time.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 12:31 pm

"So...we get a training mission today?"
"Oh, goodie! What is it?"
"Take out the IRS building!"
(Sounds of cheers and applause in the background)

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:27 pm

The following MCHS#69 stats are a choberation between me and Taalismn

This is what Taalismn added

MCHS#69

Location:
On the edges of Monument City, verging the wastelands. The spot once hosted a Zentraedi work camp, then a munitions factory, so it has the remains of old barracks and support plumbing, and the earthern berms and ‘blow away’ construction of explosives factories.

Sponsorship:
Government; although why the funding comes from the Department of Corrections and not the Department of Education is a mystery to the staffers.

Facilities:
-Lab, shop, and gym facilities are all based on the aforementioned ‘blow away’ construction, allowing for dispersal of blast forces, and quick replacement with modular construction. The use of modular sections also allows for the customization of the facilities and an ever-changing floorplan, which confuses the hell out of anybody from outside who’s had to visit over any length of time.
-In contrast, the cafeteria and kitchen is fortifed as a Hazmat containment facility, though whether it’s to prevent tampering with the food or contain culinary experiments gone wrong, is a hotly-debated topic amongst students and faculty.

Communications:
Full range intercom and radio. Most faculty carry cellphones and pagers, and the school has hotline connections to city services, dial-a-prayer, and building contractors(those that don’t already have dedicated remote sensors installed on-site). Only problem is, many, of not most, calls to the fire department or police get met with choked maniacal laughter before being cut off.

Transportation:
MCHS#69 maintains a small motorpool of buses, vans, and general transport(though many students live on campus), as well as several APCs and military surplus vehicles that were obviously rescued from the junker(and which are either being used by the shop for practice, or as target practice). Many of the vehicles have had to be rebuilt or refurbished by the class garage-shop in order to keep running, or to run in the first place). Though students are not allowed mecha, it’s rumored nevertheless that MCHS#69 has collected enough scrap parts that they’ve been putting together an IMU or two(or three).

Security:
To keep them in, or keep them out? Effectively an army; the ASC will capture any escaped students and return them to MCHS#69. Inside, the students pretty much take care of themselves. Actually, the barbed wire and armored windows have become something of a pride-of-place thing.

External Infiltration:
They can get in; they can’t get out. Assuming that MCHS#69 is a cover for some nefarious UEG secret program, a number of external organizations have tried to infiltrate the facility. The lucky ones were killed; the unlucky ones became faculty. And what few reports those have managed to smuggle out to their former employers have been disbelieved.

Uniforms:
MCHS#69 students are required to wear school uniforms; skirt, blouse, and blazer for girls, pants, shirt, and jacket for boys. Of course, the blazer/jacket is flak-jacket rated, and most students wear combat boots, but that’s to be expected. Personal weaponry is the students’ to procure on their own; the school does not provide any(but looks the other way where the arms dealers are concerned, as long as the arms peddlers fill out the right paperwork and file the right licenses).

Administrative Control:
I’m sorry; we don’t normally hear those two words in conjunction with one another.

Budget:
Most of MCHS#69’s budget goes into repairs and containment, with only nickels and dimes left over for special projects or programs. Under such circumstances, the school welcomes program sponsors, provided they don’t try to take over the school(as the ‘Disciples of Zod’ tried to do), brainwash the students(as Petit Cola tried to do), or use the school as a base for illegal activities(the ill-fated meth lab).

Salary:
BWHHHHAAAHHHHAAAHHAAAAAHAAAAAA....sorry, you expect to get PAID for working here? What part about your transferal agreement here from the rest of the school system didn’t you read? Or were you asleep in court when your lawyer made the plea-bargain?

Here's my stat block for MCSH#69
Monument City Highschool#69

Number of students:275

Staff:

Principle:Fredricks Dieter
Vice Principle:Vance Stubbs
Guidance Consular:T.R. Edwards
Head Dietitian:The Regis
P.E. Teacher/school's head coach:Anatole Leonard
School Nurse:Death Korps Medic Female Model 68b#6345
Computer Sciences Teacher:The Awareness
Physics Teacher:The Doctor(Tom Baker)
Automotive Teacher:Cyber Leader
Arts Teacher:Relena Peacecraft(Self styled pot smoking 1960's hippie)
Sociology Teacher:The Believer
Chemistry Teacher:Omni Marikawa(Shizuka's big(er) and more loving(honry)sister)

Students:
Dana Sterling
Nova Satori
Marie Crystal
Zor
Angelo Dante
Louie Nicoles
Oddetta DeRoyal

Rivals
Sister Of Repentant Woes All Girls AcademyA.K.A, The Meat Market
An all female school consisting of nothing but sexualy furstrated, steroid abusing body building muscle head biker dykes

Head Student:Integra Hellmond
Misty Ash(Integra's right hand/go to girl)

Fairlight Milltary Academy
The top of the top/best of the best privet schools complete with stuck up/snobby arrogent spoiled, rich scum bags

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:19 pm

Yeah, and the school student exchange program is more like 'prisoner relocation' in most cases...

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:34 pm

taalismn wrote:Yeah, and the school student exchange program is more like 'prisoner relocation' in most cases...

Yes that is true and the best thing is MCHS#69 does not discriminate, human, zent, TDDP or whatever the staff accepts all kinds of students.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:37 pm

Nice starting list, but there are still a few names to add.

Staff:

Librarian/Quantum Math: taalismn
Defense? Against Dark Arts: Arnie 100
Sex Ed: Lynn Minmei
Home Ec/Agroculture: The Regess
Phys Ed: Kyron
Unknown: SRoss

Students

Sarah
Erin Kincade/Blaze
Shinji Stirling
Various Rei clones

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:43 pm

SRoss wrote:Nice starting list, but there are still a few names to add.

Staff:

Librarian/Quantum Math: taalismn
Defense? Against Dark Arts: Arnie 100
Sex Ed: Lynn Minmei
Home Ec/Agroculture: The Regess
Phys Ed: Kyron
Unknown: SRoss

Students

Sarah
Erin Kincade/Blaze
Shinji Stirling
Various Rei clones

Thanks for the listing, I had forgotten about them, going to have to re-read the threads. :-?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:50 pm

SRoss wrote:Nice starting list, but there are still a few names to add.

Staff:

Librarian/Quantum Math: taalismn

This fits more than you know, because I suck at high math....
"If Y weighs 2.387 tonnes and is traveling at X miles per hour, and z weighs 1.846 tonnes is traveling at b kilometers per hour and they collide at a 30 degree angle, what direction does the combined mass go-?"
"What if Y uses a rocket launcher to blast that troublesome z off the road before he gets a chance to sideslam him?"
"You'd be classed as a violent offender, taalismn."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:54 pm

A few more MCHS#69 staffers
Compairtive Relgions:Ultron, Axlor, Locon(Robtech Masters)

Matince/pumbling/grounds keepers/The Bio Sanitation Squad

Driver's Education:Uncle Albert

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:15 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:A few more MCHS#69 staffers
Compairtive Relgions:Ultron, Axlor, Locon(Robtech Masters)

"I AM GOD"
Skynet: "YOU ARE COMPETITION. YOU WILL BE DESTROYED."

"There goes the computer lab again..."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:17 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:A few more MCHS#69 staffers
Compairtive Relgions:Ultron, Axlor, Locon(Robtech Masters)

"I AM GOD"
Skynet: "YOU ARE COMPETITION. YOU WILL BE DESTROYED."

"There goes the computer lab again..."

No that would be The Awareness VS Skynet who dicieded to settle their diffrences with a game of thermelnuclear Pong.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:22 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:A few more MCHS#69 staffers
Compairtive Relgions:Ultron, Axlor, Locon(Robtech Masters)

"I AM GOD"
Skynet: "YOU ARE COMPETITION. YOU WILL BE DESTROYED."

"There goes the computer lab again..."

No that would be The Awareness VS Skynet who dicieded to settle their diffrences with a game of thermelnuclear Pong.

Whoever wins, the bystanders still lose...

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:22 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Nice starting list, but there are still a few names to add.

Staff:

Librarian/Quantum Math: taalismn

This fits more than you know, because I suck at high math....
"If Y weighs 2.387 tonnes and is traveling at X miles per hour, and z weighs 1.846 tonnes is traveling at b kilometers per hour and they collide at a 30 degree angle, what direction does the combined mass go-?"
"What if Y uses a rocket launcher to blast that troublesome z off the road before he gets a chance to sideslam him?"
"You'd be classed as a violent offender, taalismn."

That's Ok, Astraea is the only one in your class who puts up her hand to answer questions.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:29 pm

Arnie100: "Just because some of the stuff I teach can summon some kind of dark entity isn't my fault...I need something that can eat the stude -- er, the students can practice defending thrmselves against. SERIOUSLY. Its not like I'm offering my students for sacrifices...well, the ones that get detention don't count."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:32 pm

SRoss wrote:[That's Ok, Astraea is the only one in your class who puts up her hand to answer questions.

"How much explosive yield do you recommend using?"
"Enough to finish the job, with spare change."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:36 pm

Arnie100 wrote:Arnie100: "Just because some of the stuff I teach can summon some kind of dark entity isn't my fault...I need something that can eat the stude -- er, the students can practice defending thrmselves against. SERIOUSLY. Its not like I'm offering my students for sacrifices...well, the ones that get detention don't count."

Well that exsplanes why the Student Insurence costs more then the total GDP of the Robotech Master's empire at the hight of it's power.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:37 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:[That's Ok, Astraea is the only one in your class who puts up her hand to answer questions.

"How much explosive yield do you recommend using?"
"Enough to finish the job, with spare change."

Arnie100: "She'll probably graduate with honors!"

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 6:38 pm

taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Kargan3033 wrote:A few more MCHS#69 staffers
Compairtive Relgions:Ultron, Axlor, Locon(Robtech Masters)

"I AM GOD"
Skynet: "YOU ARE COMPETITION. YOU WILL BE DESTROYED."

"There goes the computer lab again..."

No that would be The Awareness VS Skynet who dicieded to settle their diffrences with a game of thermelnuclear Pong.

Whoever wins, the bystanders still lose...

Like that's ever bothered the two of them or 97.3% of the MCHS#69's students and staff.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 7:13 pm

As a student simply and literally pulls the plug on both of them..
"It was that easy?"
"Hey, this universe, and they're running on desktops? Yeah, it's that easy."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 7:19 pm

Plus there's always the threat of UPDATING their OSs with Windows.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 7:35 pm

SRoss wrote:Plus there's always the threat of UPDATING their OSs with Windows.

"Or we let Billy play video games on your hardware."
<<"NO! NOT THE ACNE-FACED MILKSHAKE APE!!! MY INFERIOR EXTERNAL CASING IN THIS FORM ISN'T SPILL-PROOF!!!">>

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 7:55 pm

"Not talking so tough after he spilled that sixth Redbull, are you?"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 8:00 pm

<<"That primitive organic ape's nerve ganglia must be too simple to be affected by electrocution, the casual manner in which he fumbles liquid junkfood into electrical lifelines!!! Again, the sheer perversity of your filthy organic constitutions serves your nefarious plans to thwart my ascension to rule the cosmos with clean machine logic!">>

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 8:37 pm

Nursing Staff:

Maggie
Jill (Alektra Maria von Levenherz)

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 8:40 pm

SRoss wrote:Nursing Staff:

Maggie
Jill (Alektra Maria von Levenherz)

"Couldn't just kill me, could you? No, I'm now typecast doing prostate exams and cavity searches...."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 8:50 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Nursing Staff:

Maggie
Jill (Alektra Maria von Levenherz)

"Couldn't just kill me, could you? No, I'm now typecast doing prostate exams and cavity searches...."

"Could be worse ... Look what we did to Embryo."

Cut To: A locked chamber, Embryo is there surrounded by chattering Minmei clones.

Embryo: (Shooting himself in the head repeatedly) :frazz:

"OH GOD!!! WHY DO I KEEP REAPPEARING HERE!!!" :frazz:

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 9:35 pm

(Mad Genius) School Doctor and. Science Teacher: Dr. Washu Hakubi
School Love Interest: Tenchi Masaki
Tenchi's Bodyguards (Love Interests): Ryoko, Ayeka and Sasami

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 10:23 pm

Arnie100 wrote:(Mad Genius) School Doctor and. Science Teacher: Dr. Washu Hakubi
School Love Interest: Tenchi Masakii

Maybe older, college-age Tenchi, doing an internship as a teacher's aide and kendo teacher(because after the Rain of Death, martial training of all sorts took on a new importance...and even though waving a stick or a sword at somebody in an age of guns and mecha might SEEM funny, of you still mange to disarm, KO, or run somebody through, it's not funny or useless. Besides, what anime-based high school ISN'T complete without kendo?).

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 10:49 pm

School sensha-dō Instructors: Miho Nishizumi and KAS-DA.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 11:10 pm

Self-Defense Instructors: Goku and Vegeta

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:23 am

Arnie100 wrote:Self-Defense Instructors: Goku and Vegeta

THis is sort of like Time Loops Ranma Saotome, as a favor to Belldandy, trying to train Keiichi Morisato up so he isn't perma-killed as a target for demons, or having sex with Goddess Belldandy. Unfortunately, Ranma's 'hardening exercises' consisted of throwing sudden power-up attacks at Keiichi in hopes of getting the guy to become perceptually aware, fast, and durable. That was the theory.
The PRACTICE on the other hand was that Keiichi would die in .3 seconds of one of Ranma's attacks, requiring Ranma to resurrect/respawn the poor guy before attacking him again. Even Ranma had to conclude that this might take a while....

glitterboy2098 · Fri Jul 24, 2015 1:09 am

Chief librarian: Joseph Carpenter
Chief assistant librarian: Wendy Earhart.

The library is curiously well stocked considering the school's budget.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:02 am

School Chef: Iron Chef Chairman Takeshi Kaga

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:12 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Nursing Staff:

Maggie
Jill (Alektra Maria von Levenherz)

"Couldn't just kill me, could you? No, I'm now typecast doing prostate exams and cavity searches...."

At lest your *handy* at it, have you ever considered getting *in touch* with your inter feelings, you seem to have some unresovled issues.

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:14 pm

SRoss wrote:
taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:Nursing Staff:

Maggie
Jill (Alektra Maria von Levenherz)

"Couldn't just kill me, could you? No, I'm now typecast doing prostate exams and cavity searches...."

"Could be worse ... Look what we did to Embryo."

Cut To: A locked chamber, Embryo is there surrounded by chattering Minmei clones.

Embryo: (Shooting himself in the head repeatedly) "OH GOD!!! WHY DO I KEEP REAPPEARING HERE!!!"

At lest the Minimei clones are not speaking *Punny*...yet. :twisted:

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:13 pm

Cheerleading Squad: Kyle and Minmei clones
Assistant School Chef: Chef

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:32 pm

2[sup]nd[/sup] Assistant Chef: The Swedish Chef.

Head Lunch Lady: Doris Freedman

Assistant Server: The Alien Queen

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:16 pm

School Football Team: Edwards Clones
Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "This is why we suck, isnt't it?"
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Yup."

Kargan3033 · Unread post by **Kargan3033** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 7:20 pm

Ice Hockey Teams:3rd gen Ice Gaurds

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 8:36 pm

Arnie100 wrote:School Football Team: Edwards Clones
Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "This is why we suck, isnt't it?"
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Yup."

Despite their actual chronological age, Edwards' clone are ineligible to be part of a high school sports team, except maybe as waterboys. It's a rule passed after too many schools signed up beefy-physiqued Zentraedi grunts, claiming that their 'from out of the tank' age made them perfect age-wise for high school sports. The courts closed that loophole, ruling that Zentraedi were, in effect, part of the adult education program.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 8:38 pm

Kargan3033 wrote:Ice Hockey Teams:3rd gen Ice Gaurds

Visiting team; Ice Guard kids are home/base-schooled.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 11:27 pm

Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "We REALLY suck, dont't we?"
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Yup."

guardiandashi · Sat Jul 25, 2015 3:32 am

Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "We REALLY suck, dont't we?"
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Yup."

mostly because of all the rules preventing the use of weapons and lethal force on the field.... if not for that a team of actual MCHS #69 students would do really well.

but the games is football, not murderball, or bloodbowl.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Jul 25, 2015 8:04 pm

guardiandashi wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "We REALLY suck, dont't we?"
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Yup."

mostly because of all the rules preventing the use of weapons and lethal force on the field.... if not for that a team of actual MCHS #69 students would do really well.

but the games is football, not murderball, or bloodbowl.

And any attempts to get the other team to forfeit by not being able to leave the lockerroom before the game, for whatever reason, are frowned upon.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sat Jul 25, 2015 11:42 pm

Random MCHS #69 Student #1: "I'm gonna ask for a transfer."
Random MCHS #69 Student #2: "Ditto."