Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:29 am

Standing on the forward deck several soldiers shooting full auto 223 bursts Mr Snow tries to explain the physics behind parrying bullets.
"You see you just have to be really fast...."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:46 am

say652 wrote:Standing on the forward deck several soldiers shooting full auto 223 bursts Mr Snow tries to explain the physics behind parrying bullets.
"You see you just have to be really fast...."

"That's why we prefer proximity-fused explosive bullets."
"I favor flamethrowers..really hard to parry napalm."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:58 am

Using the napalm as a hot shower.
"Least I won't run out of hot water and it gets rid of fleas"

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 11:40 am

say652 wrote:Using the napalm as a hot shower.
"Least I won't run out of hot water and it gets rid of fleas"

"Today, class, we will talk about WMDs, specifically Relativistic Missiles(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relativistic_kill_vehicle) and their use in smiting."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 12:20 pm

Mr Snow raises his hand.
"Can I be excused? "

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 12:39 pm

say652 wrote:Mr Snow raises his hand.
"Can I be excused? "

"No excuse for you!"
"At least we now know that the Soup Nazi is still gainfullly employed."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 1:11 pm

Huummmphhffing and taking his seat, Mr Snow listens intently about things he knows absolutely nothing about.

"Still confused as to why these things are necessary, scratching and biting is definitely the way to go."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 1:25 pm

say652 wrote:Using the napalm as a hot shower.
"Least I won't run out of hot water and it gets rid of fleas"

Except for Hyperfleas, they require powdered thermite and crossing the streams with two or more Proton packs.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 2:36 pm

"Annie! Your cat's loose again!"
Annie: "You bad kitty! We're gonna have to FIX you." :twisted:

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:01 pm

Arnie100 wrote:"Annie! Your cat's loose again!"
Annie: "You bad kitty! We're gonna have to FIX you."

"ANNIE! PUT DOWN THE PINKING SHEARS!!!" :eek:

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:20 pm

"Enough! Going Ssj5 Mr Snow tears that little psychos head clean off then punts it into orbit."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 3:55 pm

SRoss wrote:
say652 wrote:Using the napalm as a hot shower.
"Least I won't run out of hot water and it gets rid of fleas"

Except for Hyperfleas, they require powdered thermite and crossing the streams with two or more Proton packs.

They were bred to survive long-term without a host on Venus. They have spliced DNA from Godzilla's body-mites and Chernobyl cockroaches. The gibbering mad scientist we bought them off loudly proclaimed them 'the perfect species'. The xenomorphs we tried them on would agree...if the Gigeroids had survived the experience.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 4:09 pm

taalismn wrote:
SRoss wrote:
say652 wrote:Using the napalm as a hot shower.
"Least I won't run out of hot water and it gets rid of fleas"

Except for Hyperfleas, they require powdered thermite and crossing the streams with two or more Proton packs.

They were bred to survive long-term without a host on Venus. They have spliced DNA from Godzilla's body-mites and Chernobyl cockroaches. The gibbering mad scientist we bought them off loudly proclaimed them 'the perfect species'. The xenomorphs we tried them on would agree...if the Gigeroids had survived the experience.

Mr. Snow: "How bad could they be?"

SRoss: "THIS is what Dolza looked like BEFORE he encountered the Hyperfleas."

Mr. Snow: :eek:

"RWOAL!!!" :eek:

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 4:19 pm

say652 wrote:"Enough! Going Ssj5 Mr Snow tears that little psychos head clean off then punts it into orbit."

"You're dreaming again, Mr. Snow."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:17 pm

Arnie100 wrote:
say652 wrote:"Enough! Going Ssj5 Mr Snow tears that little psychos head clean off then punts it into orbit."

"You're dreaming again, Mr. Snow."

"Cat's gone delusional again!"
"You know, Annie, animals calm down considerably after they've been spayed. You might want to consider that for your cat if he's apparently plotting to kill you."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:22 pm

"You've obviously never owned a cat, it's our job to try and kill our owners. Circle of life and all. And stupid plot immunity getting as bad as the Forgotten Realms Novels around here."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:49 pm

say652 wrote:"You've obviously never owned a cat, it's our job to try and kill our owners. Circle of life and all. And stupid plot immunity getting as bad as the Forgotten Realms Novels around here."

Suddenly a wild Squibbon shows up and distracts everyone.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:50 pm

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
say652 wrote:"Enough! Going Ssj5 Mr Snow tears that little psychos head clean off then punts it into orbit."

"You're dreaming again, Mr. Snow."

"Cat's gone delusional again!"
"You know, Annie, animals calm down considerably after they've been spayed. You might want to consider that for your cat if he's apparently plotting to kill you."

Annie: "Would vibrobladed hedge shears do? Or do I need something with more POWER?"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:51 pm

Arnie100 wrote:
taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:
say652 wrote:"Enough! Going Ssj5 Mr Snow tears that little psychos head clean off then punts it into orbit."

"You're dreaming again, Mr. Snow."

"Cat's gone delusional again!"
"You know, Annie, animals calm down considerably after they've been spayed. You might want to consider that for your cat if he's apparently plotting to kill you."

Annie: "Would vibrobladed hedge shears do? Or do I need something with more POWER?"

Tim Taylor, Shop Teacher: :twisted:

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 5:57 pm

Pink Bunny-Eared Roomba: "I Volunteer to be Upgraded to Spay-Bot."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 8:00 pm

"Yea I'm going some place safe like the nightlands."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 8:02 pm

Meanwhile in the Ballad of Smooth Gravy....

Thoroughly berating a woman for letting her child wander off into a snowy wolf's Den Gravy continues his quest to take the throne from a brother he never new he had...

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 9:17 pm

say652 wrote:"Yea I'm going some place safe like the nightlands."

"I heard they also have roombas with attitude."
"Roombas. Common cleaning machine found in every dimension. Some dimension's Roombas tend to be more homicidal then others. I also heard Roombas have cross-dimensional uploading capabilities."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Thu Apr 21, 2016 10:56 pm

"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 1:42 pm

Edwards and Kyle, arrive at the river Styx after being trampled during Mr. Snow's Hovertank driving lesson...

Urd & Marller: (Rocking out to Prince) "Just find your own way out."

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 1:44 pm

say652 wrote:"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

"Probably because you enraged the ones in this dimension with your antics. They're normally docile and stay out of the way."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 7:32 pm

say652 wrote:"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

"Billy-Bob Bozinski's All-Night Albanian Delicatessen and Driving School"

guardiandashi · Fri Apr 22, 2016 7:47 pm

say652 wrote:"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

as soon as you fill out forms DE-10478JHT, CE-15789945-be, and LB-999ab1230330

your drivers ED instructor will be waiting for you in field 1578332
your hover tank will be in the bunker on the east end of the field.
your instructors name is Nike.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 7:54 pm

guardiandashi wrote:
say652 wrote:"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

as soon as you fill out forms DE-10478JHT, CE-15789945-be, and LB-999ab1230330

your drivers ED instructor will be waiting for you in field 1578332
your hover tank will be in the bunker on the east end of the field.
your instructors name is Nike.

"And sign these forms. This will allow the school to avoid any lawsuits due to your actions and transfer said lawsuits unto you. Thank you and have a nice day."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 8:32 pm

"Don't worry about the field being unsweptunmowed. Just push on through it."

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 8:47 pm

Beginning the trek to the mythical location for "cat" training Mr Snow feels this may infact be a snipe hunt.

guardiandashi · Fri Apr 22, 2016 8:53 pm

Arnie100 wrote:
guardiandashi wrote:
say652 wrote:"I haven't seen them until I got too this God forsaken place. When can I learn to pilot a Hover Tank?"

as soon as you fill out forms DE-10478JHT, CE-15789945-be, and LB-999ab1230330

your drivers ED instructor will be waiting for you in field 1578332
your hover tank will be in the bunker on the east end of the field.
your instructors name is Nike.

"And sign these forms. This will allow the school to avoid any lawsuits due to your actions and transfer said lawsuits unto you. Thank you and have a nice day."

clarification the forms include:
1 consent for the "student" to enroll in hover tank "drivers ED" under simulated combat conditions.
2 a release of all liability having to due with "accidents" during training up to and including significant property damage, vehicular damage, and personal injuries.
3 acknowledgement and consent that instructor "Nike" may make any and all decisions on the suitability and granting of License, or sanctions as needed to the student with no recourse or appeal.

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 10:22 pm

As part of the Nautical Training program, Edwards! You'll be commanding the HMS Campbelltown. Annie will be leading the students against you from the Musashi.

Edwards: :nh:

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 10:25 pm

SRoss wrote:As part of the Nautical Training program, Edwards! You'll be commanding the HMS Campbelltown. Annie will be leading the students against you from the Musashi.

Edwards:

"Also, the Musashi will be using LIVE ammunition, while your ship has been stripped of weapons and ammo. We don't want the students injured, do we?"

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Fri Apr 22, 2016 10:33 pm

During the combat briefing.
"Ms Annie Sir!" Mr Snow salutes.
"To avoid breaking my tank would you like me to just jump in there and Pulverize them, then bring the tanks in?"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sat Apr 23, 2016 9:34 am

say652 wrote:During the combat briefing.
"Ms Annie Sir!" Mr Snow salutes.
"To avoid breaking my tank would you like me to just jump in there and Pulverize them, then bring the tanks in?"

"Um, mam? were at sea!"

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Sat Apr 23, 2016 10:35 am

"That's why you're in charge sir. "

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sat Apr 23, 2016 8:09 pm

Arnie100 wrote:[

"Also, the Musashi will be using LIVE ammunition, while your ship has been stripped of weapons and ammo. We don't want the students injured, do we?"

"Ypu'll also be using the damage control trainer boat."
"...isn't that the one with the remote control sea valves and leaks?"

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun May 01, 2016 5:29 pm

Mr Snow was quite pleased with himself as he headed down the hall. He had caught the red eyed hamster-like creature and carried it proudly by the nape of it's neck in his teeth. Suddenly he rounded the corner into Dana.

Dana: (Snatching the creature from Snow's teeth) :love:

"How cute!!!" :love:

Mr Snow was about to argue that that was HIS quick furry thing, when Dana, eyes glowing red, lept into a nearby hovertank and started firing wildly inside the school.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sun May 01, 2016 5:44 pm

Annie: (Spotting Mr. Snow) "KITTY!! THERE YOU ARE! I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU! I'm gonna stuff you in my toy box so you can't get away, again!" :twisted:

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun May 01, 2016 5:47 pm

Arnie100 wrote:Annie: (Spotting Mr. Snow) "KITTY!! THERE YOU ARE! I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU! I'm gonna stuff you in my toy box so you can't get away, again!"

Samuel L. Jackson: (Turning toward Mr Snow) "Run Stupid!!!"

Then he get taken out by one of Dana's cannon shots.

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Sun May 01, 2016 7:32 pm

Throw the tank at Annie and make my escape

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Sun May 01, 2016 8:00 pm

In full dragon mode, Annie sends Dana's tank flying into the fountain. Drenching her and the hamster critter...

Dana: (Snapping out of it) "Hey? Why am I wet ... and why is the school on fire?" :-?

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun May 01, 2016 8:11 pm

That sudden thump and zap is Mister Snow discovering MCHS#69's variant of 'invisible fencing'. Genesis Pit-grade.

Arnie100 · Unread post by **Arnie100** » Sun May 01, 2016 8:15 pm

FireRoomba #1: <<And yet again we have to put out the fires these crazy humans start...>>
FireRoomba #2: <<Extermination would be the only way to free us from this insanity...>>

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Sun May 01, 2016 8:23 pm

"Pffft a small white Dragon and a big haired androgynous Mad Scientist is the best This place has. I'm going home."

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Sun May 01, 2016 8:51 pm

say652 wrote:"Pffft a small white Dragon and a big haired androgynous Mad Scientist is the best This place has. I'm going home."

"Ypu're certain the tracking beacon is in place?"
"He suspects nothing."

SRoss · Unread post by **SRoss** » Mon May 02, 2016 9:50 am

say652 wrote:"Pffft a small white Dragon and a big haired androgynous Mad Scientist is the best This place has. I'm going home."

Small?

say652 · Unread post by **say652** » Mon May 02, 2016 9:55 am

After defeating the darkness and Ruling Albion as a good and just King.
Gravy finally blinks into reality, or so he believes. Washu has deposited him in Black Ops 3 to test his combat expertise.

taalismn · Unread post by **taalismn** » Mon May 02, 2016 10:06 am

say652 wrote:After defeating the darkness and Ruling Albion as a good and just King.
Gravy finally blinks into reality, or so he believes. Washu has deposited him in Black Ops 3 to test his combat expertise.

That's her Level One hamster cage.
The big exercise wheel and the pellet dispenser should have been the big tip-offs.