Mis-Credited, Mis-Stated Quotes, Rifts Style!!!

cornholioprime · Mon Jun 20, 2005 6:11 pm

"God has a hard-on for Undead Murder-Wraiths. Because we kill....everything we see."

-Arcane Drill Sergeant Hartman

Capt. Meschievitz · Mon Jun 20, 2005 10:44 pm

"you expect me to talk?"

"No Mr Ranger, I expect you to die" States Splynncryth

mmmmmmm let ya think about that

Comrade Corsarius · Mon Jun 20, 2005 11:02 pm

Capt. Meschievitz wrote:"you expect me to talk?"

"No Mr Ranger, I expect you to die" States Splynncryth

mmmmmmm let ya think about that

It depends if you are talking about
a) Bond, James Bond.
b) Austen Powers
c) Simpsons rip-off of Bond.

Capt. Meschievitz · Mon Jun 20, 2005 11:06 pm

because it's so open ended it doesn't matter...

Capt. Meschievitz · Mon Jun 20, 2005 11:11 pm

And you open the door and you step inside
We're inside our hearts
Now imagine your pain as a white ball of healing light
Thats right
Your pain, the pain of self is a white ball of healing light
I dont think so

This is your life
Good to the last drop
It doesnt get any better than this
This is your life and its ending one minute at a time

This isnt a seminar
This isnt a weekend retreat
Where you are now you can't even imagine what the bottom will be like
Only after disaster can we be resurrected
It's only after you've lost everything you are free to do anything

Nothing is static
Everything is evolving
Everything is falling apart

You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake
You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else
We are all part of the same compost heap
We are the all singing all dancing crap of the world

You are not your bank account
You are not the clothes you wear
You are not the contents of your wallet
You are not your bowel cancer
You are not your grande latte
You are not the car you drive
You are not your fu@king kakkeys

You have to give up
You have to realise that someday you will die
Until you know that
You are useless

I say, let me never be complete
I say, may I never be content
I say, deliver me from swedish furniture
I say, deliver me from clever art
I say deliver me from clear skin and perfect teeth
I say you have to give up
I say evolve, and let the chips fall as they may

I want you to hit the DBee as hard as you can
I want you to hit the DBee as hard as you can
Welcome to CS Fight School
If this is your first night - You have to fight
CS SGT with the evening word....

cornholioprime · Tue Jun 21, 2005 1:29 am

"Bob......The rest of the Book....'To Serve Man...'

It's....

It's.....

a Cookbook!!"

-Unidentified Female Rogue Scholar, warning her Adventurer boyfriend about the Menu at one of the Splynn Restaurants; unfortunately, by that time he had already taken several bites out of the "Hamburger" in front of him.....

Jesterzzn · Unread post by **Jesterzzn** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 1:30 am

FallenDruid wrote:Anybody done this one...?

Rogue scientist walks out of his sleeping quarters one morning, odd ball shaped thing in his hand.

Randomguy: What's that?

Scientist: I'm not sure. *examines it carefully, avoiding the big red button* I built it while I was asleep. But it looks cool. *tosses it to randomguy* By the way, I'm missing four type three fusion blocks and a nuclear power cell.

cornholioprime · Tue Jun 21, 2005 1:31 am

And in the same vein.....

"Please, Mr. Chambers, eat up.

We wouldn't want you to lose weight......"

-Kanamit D-Bee inspecting the "livestock" at a popular Splynn Eatery, days before Bob the Adventurer showed up...

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 4:08 am

"My hyprocracy is complete" --deebee gunslinger as he puts on CS armor
"All right we'll call it a draw." --trashed CS IAR to the adult dragon

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 4:49 am

One from an actual game:
"Clato! verata! Nictu!" AFTER the cybernight removed the ancient tablet from the alter of the temple of death.

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 4:55 am

Soul harvester-"I'll swallow your soul"
Psi-warrior - "Come get some."

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 2:14 pm

finn69 wrote:
Atramentus wrote:Can't believe I didn't think of it until now.

A patient of the Angel of Death who doesn't know where he is when she enters the room...

"Hello, nurse!"

I LOVE THE ANIMANIACS!! HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!

gee archie what are we going to do today??

the same thing we do every night hagan.......TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!!!!

ARCHIE/Hagan AYPWIPs
Win Big
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find a dogboy and a hose at this hour?

Where Robots Dare
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find an open Atlantean tattoo parlor at this time of night?

Battle for the Planet
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so ARCHIE, but if we didn't have ears we'd look like grays.

Pavlov's Bots
A: Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Hagan?
H: Uh, yeah ARCHIE, but where are we going to find Altarian Warrior body suits our size?

Jockey for Position
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE but isn't Emperor Prosek already married?

Bubba Bo Bob ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE, but chromium chafes me so.

Puppet Rulers
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Uh, I think so, ARCHIE, but we'll never get a Kittani to use dental floss.

The Helhagan Formula
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but you and Erin Tarn, I mean, what would the children look like.

Meet John ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but this time you put the trousers on the Kittani.

Cranial Crusader
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but I can't memorize a whole opera in Splugorth.

Das Mech
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but there's still a Xiticix stuck in here from last time.

Hagan and the Fog
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but, the Altarian Slavers? I mean, their girls, aren’t they?

Where No Mech Has Gone Before
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but PA with horizontal stripes make me look chubby.

A Hagan and ARCHIE Christmas
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but 'apply North Pole' to what?

Mech of La Mancha
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but umm, why would Joseph Prosek do a musical?

The Third Mech
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but what if Quetzalcoatl won't wear the nylons?

Haganasso
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if you replace the 'H' with an 'F' my name would be Fagan, wouldn't it?

The Hag Candidate
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but do I really need two tongues?

ARCHIE's Song
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but we're already naked.

Welcome to the Jungle
H: ARCHIE, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
A: We eat the Glitterboy?

ARCHIE Noir
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if Joseph Stallin’ why don’t we just leave him behind?

Hagan and ARCHIE... and Karl
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so Larry, and um, ARCHIE, but how will we get seven dwarves to shave their legs.

Funny, You Don't Look Rhennish
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what kind of rides do they have in Prosekland?

Calvin ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but three Deadboys in a tub? Ooh that's unsanitary.

The Real Life
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Yes, ARCHIE, but if our knees bent the other way, how would we ride a hovercycle?

Big in Japan
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want to see Snow White and the Seven Cyberknights?

You Said a Mechful
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but then my name would be Boogan.

Hagan at the Bat
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but shouldn't the bat boy be a mutant?

Broadway Malady
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want a splugorth tongue?

ARCHIEie the Pooh
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIEie, but then wouldn’t he be Karl Say Again?

The Hagan P.O.V
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what if the Death won't wear the beach thong?

ARCHIE Food
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Whoof, oh, I'd have to say the odds are slim, ARCHIE.
A: True.
H: I mean, really, when have I ever been pondering what you've been pondering?
A: To my knowledge, never.
H: Exactly. So, what are the chances that this time, I'm pondering what you're pondering?
A: Next to nil.
H: Well, that's exactly what I'm thinking, too.
A: Therefore, you are pondering what I'm pondering.
H: Poit, I guess I am.

finn69 · Unread post by **finn69** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 4:23 pm

Zer0 Kay wrote:
finn69 wrote:
Atramentus wrote:Can't believe I didn't think of it until now.

A patient of the Angel of Death who doesn't know where he is when she enters the room...

"Hello, nurse!"

I LOVE THE ANIMANIACS!! HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!

gee archie what are we going to do today??

the same thing we do every night hagan.......TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!!!!

ARCHIE/Hagan AYPWIPs
Win Big
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find a dogboy and a hose at this hour?

Where Robots Dare
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find an open Atlantean tattoo parlor at this time of night?

Battle for the Planet
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so ARCHIE, but if we didn't have ears we'd look like grays.

Pavlov's Bots
A: Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Hagan?
H: Uh, yeah ARCHIE, but where are we going to find Altarian Warrior body suits our size?

Jockey for Position
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE but isn't Emperor Prosek already married?

Bubba Bo Bob ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE, but chromium chafes me so.

Puppet Rulers
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Uh, I think so, ARCHIE, but we'll never get a Kittani to use dental floss.

The Helhagan Formula
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but you and Erin Tarn, I mean, what would the children look like.

Meet John ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but this time you put the trousers on the Kittani.

Cranial Crusader
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but I can't memorize a whole opera in Splugorth.

Das Mech
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but there's still a Xiticix stuck in here from last time.

Hagan and the Fog
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but, the Altarian Slavers? I mean, their girls, aren’t they?

Where No Mech Has Gone Before
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but PA with horizontal stripes make me look chubby.

A Hagan and ARCHIE Christmas
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but 'apply North Pole' to what?

Mech of La Mancha
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but umm, why would Joseph Prosek do a musical?

The Third Mech
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but what if Quetzalcoatl won't wear the nylons?

Haganasso
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if you replace the 'H' with an 'F' my name would be Fagan, wouldn't it?

The Hag Candidate
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but do I really need two tongues?

ARCHIE's Song
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but we're already naked.

Welcome to the Jungle
H: ARCHIE, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
A: We eat the Glitterboy?

ARCHIE Noir
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if Joseph Stallin’ why don’t we just leave him behind?

Hagan and ARCHIE... and Karl
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so Larry, and um, ARCHIE, but how will we get seven dwarves to shave their legs.

Funny, You Don't Look Rhennish
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what kind of rides do they have in Prosekland?

Calvin ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but three Deadboys in a tub? Ooh that's unsanitary.

The Real Life
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Yes, ARCHIE, but if our knees bent the other way, how would we ride a hovercycle?

Big in Japan
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want to see Snow White and the Seven Cyberknights?

You Said a Mechful
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but then my name would be Boogan.

Hagan at the Bat
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but shouldn't the bat boy be a mutant?

Broadway Malady
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want a splugorth tongue?

ARCHIEie the Pooh
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIEie, but then wouldn’t he be Karl Say Again?

The Hagan P.O.V
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what if the Death won't wear the beach thong?

ARCHIE Food
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Whoof, oh, I'd have to say the odds are slim, ARCHIE.
A: True.
H: I mean, really, when have I ever been pondering what you've been pondering?
A: To my knowledge, never.
H: Exactly. So, what are the chances that this time, I'm pondering what you're pondering?
A: Next to nil.
H: Well, that's exactly what I'm thinking, too.
A: Therefore, you are pondering what I'm pondering.
H: Poit, I guess I am.

those were right on!!!!

finn69 · Unread post by **finn69** » Tue Jun 21, 2005 4:24 pm

gremlin79 wrote:I had to check your profile after that. I take it your base is deserted?

HUH? WHAT THE HEY?

cornholioprime · Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:08 am

"Cry Havoc!! And let slip the Dogboys of War!!!"

-William Shakespeare, CS Loyalist citizen of Iron Heart

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 22, 2005 8:01 am

gremlin79 wrote:I had to check your profile after that. I take it your base is deserted?

Uh fairly. Approx 400 people. But my job is at a desk and the only real work I do is take trouble calls and dispatch technicians... I miss working on my equipment

I supposed to be going back to the shop soon though. I find the desk detrimental to my weight loss.

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 22, 2005 8:04 am

finn69 wrote:
gremlin79 wrote:I had to check your profile after that. I take it your base is deserted?

HUH? WHAT THE HEY?

He was probably talking to me... look at my profile, see I'm at a base. Get it now?

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Wed Jun 22, 2005 8:07 am

finn69 wrote:
Zer0 Kay wrote:
finn69 wrote:
Atramentus wrote:Can't believe I didn't think of it until now.

A patient of the Angel of Death who doesn't know where he is when she enters the room...

"Hello, nurse!"

I LOVE THE ANIMANIACS!! HERE IS ANOTHER ONE!

gee archie what are we going to do today??

the same thing we do every night hagan.......TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!!!!

ARCHIE/Hagan AYPWIPs
[size=9]Win Big
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find a dogboy and a hose at this hour?

Where Robots Dare
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but where are we going to find an open Atlantean tattoo parlor at this time of night?

Battle for the Planet
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so ARCHIE, but if we didn't have ears we'd look like grays.

Pavlov's Bots
A: Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Hagan?
H: Uh, yeah ARCHIE, but where are we going to find Altarian Warrior body suits our size?

Jockey for Position
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE but isn't Emperor Prosek already married?

Bubba Bo Bob ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Wuh, I think so, ARCHIE, but chromium chafes me so.

Puppet Rulers
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Uh, I think so, ARCHIE, but we'll never get a Kittani to use dental floss.

The Helhagan Formula
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but you and Erin Tarn, I mean, what would the children look like.

Meet John ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but this time you put the trousers on the Kittani.

Cranial Crusader
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but I can't memorize a whole opera in Splugorth.

Das Mech
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but there's still a Xiticix stuck in here from last time.

Hagan and the Fog
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but, the Altarian Slavers? I mean, their girls, aren’t they?

Where No Mech Has Gone Before
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but PA with horizontal stripes make me look chubby.

A Hagan and ARCHIE Christmas
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but 'apply North Pole' to what?

Mech of La Mancha
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but umm, why would Joseph Prosek do a musical?

The Third Mech
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but what if Quetzalcoatl won't wear the nylons?

Haganasso
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if you replace the 'H' with an 'F' my name would be Fagan, wouldn't it?

The Hag Candidate
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Well, I think so, ARCHIE, but do I really need two tongues?

ARCHIE's Song
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but we're already naked.

Welcome to the Jungle
H: ARCHIE, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
A: We eat the Glitterboy?

ARCHIE Noir
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but if Joseph Stallin’ why don’t we just leave him behind?

Hagan and ARCHIE... and Karl
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so Larry, and um, ARCHIE, but how will we get seven dwarves to shave their legs.

Funny, You Don't Look Rhennish
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what kind of rides do they have in Prosekland?

Calvin ARCHIE
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIE, but three Deadboys in a tub? Ooh that's unsanitary.

The Real Life
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Yes, ARCHIE, but if our knees bent the other way, how would we ride a hovercycle?

Big in Japan
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want to see Snow White and the Seven Cyberknights?

You Said a Mechful
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but then my name would be Boogan.

Hagan at the Bat
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but shouldn't the bat boy be a mutant?

Broadway Malady
A: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but why would anyone want a splugorth tongue?

ARCHIEie the Pooh
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Umm, I think so, ARCHIEie, but then wouldn’t he be Karl Say Again?

The Hagan P.O.V
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: I think so, ARCHIE, but what if the Death won't wear the beach thong?

ARCHIE Food
A: Hagan, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
H: Whoof, oh, I'd have to say the odds are slim, ARCHIE.
A: True.
H: I mean, really, when have I ever been pondering what you've been pondering?
A: To my knowledge, never.
H: Exactly. So, what are the chances that this time, I'm pondering what you're pondering?
A: Next to nil.
H: Well, that's exactly what I'm thinking, too.
A: Therefore, you are pondering what I'm pondering.
H: Poit, I guess I am.
[/size]

those were right on!!!!

Thanks

cornholioprime · Thu Jun 23, 2005 12:24 pm

"I feel your Pain."

-William Clinton, Pleasurer Changeling, speaking to his Bondage Partner, an Altess Noble known only as "Monica L."

kamikazzijoe · Thu Jun 23, 2005 11:30 pm

"The emperor is evi!"
"From my point of view tolkien is evil" --Last words between a cyber knight master and his apprentice before the SOT.

I thought my Tombstone quote would have gotten commentsl :-(

cornholioprime · Fri Jun 24, 2005 8:01 am

kamikazzijoe wrote:"The emperor is evi!"
"From my point of view tolkien is evil" --Last words between a cyber knight master and his apprentice before the SOT.

I thought my Tombstone quote would have gotten commentsl

Uh....I'm your Huckleberry?!?!?

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 1:35 pm

"Some accidents are going to happen whether you're drinking and on drugs or not!"
-Cyber-Knight from the west coast

"I'm sick of people saying that Erin is smart and I'm stupid. Erin's just smart at things like explaining things and getting people to do stuff, and I'm smart at playing hockey and shoveling snow."
-Lazzlo (drunk)

"Get two birds stoned at once"
-a SMART deadboy

"Sweet-and-power chicken"
-a faerie ordering fast food

"I bet you don't even have a search warranty do ya?"
-a Citizen of Chi-town (who was promptly shot) to a dog boy

"Make like a tree and f@#k off!"
-a pissed off Psi-Druid

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 2:16 pm

cornholioprime wrote:Uh....I'm your Huckleberry?!?!?

Play for blood?

cornholioprime · Fri Jun 24, 2005 4:19 pm

kamikazzijoe wrote:
cornholioprime wrote:Uh....I'm your Huckleberry?!?!?

Play for blood?

"Why Kamikazzi, are we cross??

Because, if you were not my friend, it would be more than I could bear...."

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Fri Jun 24, 2005 10:27 pm

"We shall double our efforts!"

"I hope so for your sake commander, the Emperor is not as forgiving as I am"

CS commander speaking with General Ross Underhill after his failure to capture a strategic hill

cornholioprime · Sat Jun 25, 2005 3:49 am

Toc Rat wrote:"We shall double our efforts!"

"I hope so for your sake commander, the Emperor is not as forgiving as I am"

CS commander speaking with General Ross Underhill after his failure to capture a strategic hill

Oh Yeah??? I'll do you one better:

"Send the CS Fleet to the far side of (Port) Endor.

There they shall stay until called for."

-Emperor Prosek

Toc Rat · Unread post by **Toc Rat** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 3:59 am

"I shouldn't have come, I'm endangering the mission"

Lu'uke Starkiller, Cyber-Knight, at a CS check point

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 5:59 am

cornholioprime wrote:
kamikazzijoe wrote:
cornholioprime wrote:Uh....I'm your Huckleberry?!?!?

Play for blood?
"Why Kamikazzi, are we cross??

Because, if you were not my friend, it would be more than I could bear...."

Well you're not my hungarian devil. :demon:

finn69 · Unread post by **finn69** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 9:17 am

new researcher at lonestar speaking to doctor bradford after hearing horrific scream. MY GOD!! what was that noise??!!

reply from doctor bradford.....um cats.

Sir Blayse · Unread post by **Sir Blayse** » Sat Jun 25, 2005 8:19 pm

this is good i'm going to have to come up with some, this is great stuff

cornholioprime · Sun Jun 26, 2005 12:07 pm

"...To crush your Enemies, to see them driven before you......

...and to hear the Lamentations of the Women."

-Conan the (Larhold) Barbarian, on what is best in life

DhAkael · Unread post by **DhAkael** » Sun Jun 26, 2005 5:20 pm

"We're sorry...we thought you were dead..."
-"I was...I got better"-

-Drah-Zi to Victor Lazlo

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Mon Jun 27, 2005 5:37 am

"I don't want to go on the cart." --class clown at necromancer school after a particually bad prank.

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Mon Jun 27, 2005 6:46 am

"When I see a naked demon salivating chasing a CS citizen in a dark alley, I don't stop to think about whether or not it had problems potty training." Filthy Harry, nutset

cornholioprime · Mon Jun 27, 2005 6:23 pm

jnagyjr wrote:"Have you ever seen a grown mutant naked?"
--One CS citizen to another

"Have you ever been..in a CS Prison??"
-Leslie Nielsen, CS NTSET Interrogator

finn69 · Unread post by **finn69** » Tue Jun 28, 2005 10:26 pm

I AM CAPTAIN CHAOS!!!!! AND THIS IS MY FAITHFUL COMPANION KATO!!!!!

unknown crazy upon being captured by the C.S.

kamikazzijoe · Unread post by **kamikazzijoe** » Wed Jun 29, 2005 8:51 am

"Light goes on. Light goes off. Light goes on. Light goes off. On. Off. On. Off." Homer the Palladium fantasy barbarian shortly after coming to rifts.

Comrade Corsarius · Thu Jun 30, 2005 8:55 am

kamikazzijoe wrote:"I don't want to go on the cart." --class clown at necromancer school after a particually bad prank.

The prank being a dead-boy body suddenly sitting up and saying:

Student: Bring out yer dead!
Body: I'm not dead!
Other student: 'ere, he says he isn't dead
Student: yes he is
Body: I'm not
Student2: he isn't
Student: Well he will be soon, he's very ill
Body: I'm getting better
Student: No you're not. You'll be stone dead in a moment when the spell wears off
Body: But I don't want to go on the cart
Student: Oh, don't be such a baby
Student 2: You can't take him like that
Body: I feel fine. I think I'll go for a walk.
Student: You're not fooling anyone, you know. There's a big hole in your head.
Body (singing): I feel happy... I feel happy
*student cancels the spell and body falls into the cart*
Student 2: Right then, see you next thursday.

Deadeyeus2 · Unread post by **Deadeyeus2** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 9:53 am

"BY THE POWER OF PSYSCAPE!!!! I HAVE THE POWER!!!!!!"
Crazy calling forth his second personality

kamikazzijoe · Thu Jun 30, 2005 10:10 am

Comrade Corsarius wrote:
kamikazzijoe wrote:"I don't want to go on the cart." --class clown at necromancer school after a particually bad prank.

The prank being a dead-boy body suddenly sitting up and saying:

Student: Bring out yer dead!
Body: I'm not dead!
Other student: 'ere, he says he isn't dead
Student: yes he is
Body: I'm not
Student2: he isn't
Student: Well he will be soon, he's very ill
Body: I'm getting better
Student: No you're not. You'll be stone dead in a moment when the spell wears off
Body: But I don't want to go on the cart
Student: Oh, don't be such a baby
Student 2: You can't take him like that
Body: I feel fine. I think I'll go for a walk.
Student: You're not fooling anyone, you know. There's a big hole in your head.
Body (singing): I feel happy... I feel happy
*student cancels the spell and body falls into the cart*
Student 2: Right then, see you next thursday.

cornholioprime · Thu Jun 30, 2005 12:29 pm

Oh, so you want to play it Monty Python Style, eh??

Well, here's one for you:

[French Accent]"Go away or I shall taunt you a second time."[/French Accent]

-Free Quebecois taunting a Coalition Platoon on Siege Duty outside the Canadian City-State

Rimmerdal · Unread post by **Rimmerdal** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 5:33 pm

Okay I can't hold it back...

"Comeback, I'll bite you knee joints off!"
An evil cyber-knight. yelling at a group knights in Sampson-X9 leaving

(ahh close enough..)

cornholioprime · Sat Jul 02, 2005 1:41 am

Okay, More Monty Python, then....

"Now THAT'S what I call a Dead Parrot!!!"

-Eric Idle, Hunter, after mistakenly trying to hunt SDC Fowl with an MDC Rifle

AND

'Well, now, if we took the Bones out, then it wouldn't be CRUNCHY Human, now would it??"

-John Cleese, seller of Confectionaries at the Splynn Market

AND WHO COULD FORGET...

"...When Danger reared its Ugly Head/

King Ar'thuu turned his tail and fled..../

King Ar'thuu bravely chickened out, he did, he did."

-Monty Python, Court Jester, late of the British Isles

cornholioprime · Sat Jul 02, 2005 11:33 pm

John Kronus wrote:We are the "Cyber-Knights" who say NEE !!

Wasn't it "Nit" or something like that??

Comrade Corsarius · Sun Jul 03, 2005 6:44 am

cornholioprime wrote:
John Kronus wrote:We are the "Cyber-Knights" who say NEE !!
Wasn't it "Nit" or something like that??

It's the Knights who say 'Ni'

Sir Bedevere mispronounces it and says 'Nu' at an old woman

When they return they are no longer the knights who say 'Ni!', instead they are the Knights who say 'Icky icky icky icky ptang zoomphoi(trails off into incomprehension)'

Arthur refers to them as 'O knights who say.... er... knights who formerly said 'ni''

You're looking at King Arthur right here, from the re-enacment group 'knights of the python'. I gots to learn my lines!

Kalinda · Unread post by **Kalinda** » Sun Jul 03, 2005 12:58 pm

I'm not going to go through the thread to check, so apologies if this has been done before.

"FANG! THEY KILLED FANG! THOSE DIRTY ROTTEN STINKING FAIRIES KILLED FANG!' (Sound of laser rifle fire.) CS dead boy, on discovering that tokeen forces have offed his favorite dog boy.

cornholioprime · Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:24 am

"It is always a bad thing when Palladium Authors are allowed to affect . . . the planning of operations.."

-Irwin Rommel, CS General, lamenting the way in which "God" (KS) made the CS Military behave (rather stupidly) in the Siege on Tolkeen

Zer0 Kay · Unread post by **Zer0 Kay** » Thu Jul 07, 2005 2:12 pm

Kalinda wrote:I'm not going to go through the thread to check, so apologies if this has been done before.

"FANG! THEY KILLED FANG! THOSE DIRTY ROTTEN STINKING FAIRIES KILLED FANG!' (Sound of laser rifle fire.) CS dead boy, on discovering that tokeen forces have offed his favorite dog boy.

Or So he thought... (Sound of more laser rifle fire :shock:

funny since there silent and invisible... so how do you know your shooting?) Fang recovers from a graze. "I'm alright" CS db turns in astonishment (still shooting, and cooks Fang) looking down at fangs, newly, dead body db turns back toward the enemy "STINKING FAIRIES, YOU JUST MADE ME KILL FANG!" ("SOUND" of more laser fire).

cornholioprime · Fri Jul 08, 2005 8:14 am

"You..want..this, don't you?

The hate is swelling in you now. Take your Cosmo-Knight weapon. Use it. I am unarmed.

Strike me down with it.

Give in to your anger. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant."

-Kreeghor Emperor to Lukewarm Skystalker, Cosmo-Knight, on the verge of becoming a Fallen Cosmo-Knight

cornholioprime · Fri Jul 08, 2005 8:19 am

"Everything that has transpired has done so according to my design. Your friends, up there on the sanctuary moon, are walking into a trap, as is your Free World Council fleet.

It was I who allowed the Central Alliance to know the location of the shield generator. It is quite safe from your pitiful little band.

An entire legion of my best Invincible Guardsman troops awaits them.

Oh, I'm afraid the Naruni deflector shield will be quite operational when your friends arrive."

-The Kreeghor Emperor, addressing the captured leader of the Free World Council, as Royal Kreeghor Anakin looks on