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Posted: **Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:16 pm**

SRoss wrote:The Turkey Leader arrays his warriors climbs on his War Mount and goes to confront the enemy.

Turkey Leader: "FFFFFFFFFRRRRRREEEEEEEEEDDDDDOOOOMMMMMM!!!!"

Posted: **Sun Mar 20, 2016 11:33 pm**

Sneak further into the Park, killing every turkey I see.
"Funny my Demon and Monster lore is telling me these are Raptors, my Tracking says Raptor also, But I only have a fourth grade education so I guess they are really called Turkey's..."

Posted: **Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:02 am**

SRoss wrote:
say652 wrote:Making sure the he has the place to himself, finally.
Flying Snow begins practicing his Jump Bike tricks, using the building as his Personal Parkour Trick Riding Track.

Smiling Sebastian thinks to himself "Totally worth minimum wage."

In mid-jump Snow falls through a portal...

Washuu: "Ah, Mr. Snow! Time for your pre-employment physical. I just need to take some samples."

Random Male MCH #69 Student: "Remember the days we had the Other Lady as our nurse."

Random Female MCH #69 Student: "Yeah, I miss those days."

I honestly don't know who's worst.

Posted: **Mon Mar 21, 2016 1:06 pm**

say652 wrote:Sneak further into the Park, killing every turkey I see.
"Funny my Demon and Monster lore is telling me these are Raptors, my Tracking says Raptor also, But I only have a fourth grade education so I guess they are really called Turkey's..."

"This is why we're not allowed to use public park lands for any of our school functions. They're tired of filling in the craters and replanting the trees every week."

Posted: **Tue Mar 22, 2016 10:48 pm**

taalismn wrote:
say652 wrote:Sneak further into the Park, killing every turkey I see.
"Funny my Demon and Monster lore is telling me these are Raptors, my Tracking says Raptor also, But I only have a fourth grade education so I guess they are really called Turkey's..."

"This is why we're not allowed to use public park lands for any of our school functions. They're tired of filling in the craters and replanting the trees every week."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 2:48 pm**

"Soooo...what do you think will happen during Easter?"
"Attack of the Killer Rabbits."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 3:05 pm**

"Cats can crossbreed with Rabbits...."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 5:05 pm**

say652 wrote:"Cats can crossbreed with Rabbits...."

"Meet the Rabbit."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 6:02 pm**

Random MCHS Student #1: "Aw, man...SERIOUSLY?!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I don't know whether I should be terrified or if I should stop laughing so hard."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 6:24 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS Student #1: "Aw, man...SERIOUSLY?!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I don't know whether I should be terrified or if I should stop laughing so hard."

"Probably shouldn't tell the kids those knights were wearing MDC chain mail."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 8:02 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:"Soooo...what do you think will happen during Easter?"
"Attack of the Killer Rabbits."

"Egg minefields."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 8:19 pm**

"Perhaps a resurrection of some sort."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 9:30 pm**

Over the Intercom:
Greetings, Students, this is your principal. In keeping with how badly and readily the School Council and our UEG sponsors caved to the whims of the Parent-Teacher Association, the curriculum for Sex Education has been changed.

Last year's curriculum, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqI-28meTZ8 , was deemed too controversial.

The new curriculum will be led by our new physician in Health Studies, Doctor Sawaru Ogenki, and his nurse Ruko Tatase.

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 9:47 pm**

"Apparently the sulphur and saltpeter in the school diet wasn't enough...."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 10:37 pm**

"So, was it the mutant fish, I said the fish was going too far."

Posted: **Wed Mar 23, 2016 11:23 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:"Soooo...what do you think will happen during Easter?"
"Attack of the Killer Rabbits."

I can just see it now...

say652 wrote:"Cats can crossbreed with Rabbits...."

Are you serious?

SRoss wrote:
say652 wrote:"Cats can crossbreed with Rabbits...."

"Meet the Rabbit."

That was the rabbit I was thinking of.

Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS Student #1: "Aw, man...SERIOUSLY?!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I don't know whether I should be terrified or if I should stop laughing so hard."

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Random MCHS Student #1: "Aw, man...SERIOUSLY?!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I don't know whether I should be terrified or if I should stop laughing so hard."

"Probably shouldn't tell the kids those knights were wearing MDC chain mail."

taalismn wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:"Soooo...what do you think will happen during Easter?"
"Attack of the Killer Rabbits."

"Egg minefields."

say652 wrote:"Perhaps a resurrection of some sort."

It still might not help at all.

wyrmraker wrote:Over the Intercom:
Greetings, Students, this is your principal. In keeping with how badly and readily the School Council and our UEG sponsors caved to the whims of the Parent-Teacher Association, the curriculum for Sex Education has been changed.

Last year's curriculum, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqI-28meTZ8 , was deemed too controversial.

The new curriculum will be led by our new physician in Health Studies, Doctor Sawaru Ogenki, and his nurse Ruko Tatase.

Oh good grief. :roll:

taalismn wrote:"Apparently the sulphur and saltpeter in the school diet wasn't enough...."

SRoss wrote:"So, was it the mutant fish, I said the fish was going too far."

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 3:15 pm**

Annie: (Looking at the rabbit...) "Oooohhh...what a cute wittle bunny! Mr. Bunny, I'm gonna give you all the love and hugs you deserve!"
Killer Rabbit: :shock:

(Starts hopping away as fast as he can go...)
Random MCHS Student #1: "Now THAT'S actually funny!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I never thought I'd say this before but...Go, Annie, GO!!!!"

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 4:24 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:Annie: (Looking at the rabbit...) "Oooohhh...what a cute wittle bunny! Mr. Bunny, I'm gonna give you all the love and hugs you deserve!"
Killer Rabbit: (Starts hopping away as fast as he can go...)
Random MCHS Student #1: "Now THAT'S actually funny!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "I never thought I'd say this before but...Go, Annie, GO!!!!"

Haster: (Looking back at the other occupants of Annie's toy chest) "Quick you fools, while she's distracted! RUN!!!"

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 4:34 pm**

Cthulhu: "DAMMIT!! There's some kind of anti-escape spell or something on the lid of the chest...also, there is something compelling me NOT TO TRY TO ESCAPE!!! What do I do?! I'm so confused!!"
Hastur: "COWARD!!"
Cthulhu: :cry:

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 4:45 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:Cthulhu: "DAMMIT!! There's some kind of anti-escape spell or something on the lid of the chest...also, there is something compelling me NOT TO TRY TO ESCAPE!!! What do I do?! I'm so confused!!"
Hastur: "COWARD!!"
Cthulhu:

Gozer: "And you call yourself a God!" :nh:

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 4:52 pm**

SRoss wrote:
Arnie100 wrote:Cthulhu: "DAMMIT!! There's some kind of anti-escape spell or something on the lid of the chest...also, there is something compelling me NOT TO TRY TO ESCAPE!!! What do I do?! I'm so confused!!"
Hastur: "COWARD!!"
Cthulhu:

Gozer: "And you call yourself a God!"

Cthulhu: "But...but...she's always treated me nicely!"
Hastur: "SHE BROKE YOU!!!"
Cthulhu: "What?! No, of course not!"
Gozer: "Pathetic..."
Darkseid: "I agree!"

(Outside of Annie's Chest...)

Random MCHS Student #1: "Lookit that rabbit, go!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "Won't last...Annie's on a hovertank...wait, how did she learn how to drive a hovertank?!"

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 6:55 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:Cthulhu: "But...but...she's always treated me nicely!"
Hastur: "SHE BROKE YOU!!!"
Cthulhu: "What?! No, of course not!"
Gozer: "Pathetic..."
Darkseid: "I agree!"

(Outside of Annie's Chest...)

Random MCHS Student #1: "Lookit that rabbit, go!"
Random MCHS Student #2: "Won't last...Annie's on a hovertank...wait, how did she learn how to drive a hovertank?!"

Dana: (Running after her) "Come back with my hovertank you little thief!!!" :badbad:

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 7:38 pm**

"That's what you get, Dana, for leaving the top down on your Spartas."

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 7:53 pm**

taalismn wrote:"That's what you get, Dana, for leaving the top down on your Spartas."

"And leaving the keys in the ignition."

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 7:54 pm**

Random MCHS Student #1: "But still...where'd she learn how to drive a hovertank?"
Random MCHS Student #2: "Dayum, lookit her navigate through all those cars...oh, wait...there goes Edwards' brand-new Mercedes..."

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 8:12 pm**

"Since when have we paid Edwards enough that he could afford a Mercedes? And it's not as if his military pension pays that much either. And forget about life insurance..."

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 8:41 pm**

Edwards:

"It was a gift...from my mother! I swear on Kyle's paycheck!"
Kyle: "HEEEYYY!!"

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 8:57 pm**

Edwards: <I hope that the faculty and students don't find out the lead shielding around the Defense Against Dark Arts, and the Science labs are just pieces of cardboard with the words Lead Shielding written in marker...>

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 9:51 pm**

SRoss wrote:Edwards: <I hope that the faculty and students don't find out the lead shielding around the Defense Against Dark Arts, and the Science labs are just pieces of cardboard with the words Lead Shielding written in marker...>

Arnie100: <I hope Edwards and Kyle doesn't find out that I had the pieces of cardboard replaced with actual lead shielding and that the funds came from HIS and Kyle's paychecks...>

Posted: **Thu Mar 24, 2016 10:27 pm**

Just outside the no-man's-land perimeter cordoned around MCHS#69, a large parking lot/field serves as the assembly area for a gathering force of collection agencies' paramilitary debt collectors. Fact-sheets and pictures of T.R. Edwards and Lynn Kyle are passed around....

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:04 am**

Random MCHS Student: "Mr. Edwards? There's some people here to see you!"
Edwards: "What? I'm -- HOLY S**T!" :shock:

Kyle: "What's the ma -- HE DID IT!!!" (Points at Edwards)
Edwards: "TRAITOR!!"

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:16 am**

"Is the bounty dead or really dead??"

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:54 am**

say652 wrote:"Is the bounty dead or really dead??"

The officer in charge hands out written instructions...

They are to know fear
Then they are to know pain
After that, anything goes

Lisa Hayse-Hunter &
Lynn Minmei

Bounty Hunters & Collection Agents: :twisted:

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:49 pm**

"So they need to be reenrolled in school?"

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:06 pm**

say652 wrote:"So they need to be reenrolled in school?"

"That's not a bad idea..."
Edwards and Kyle: :shock:

Staff and Students: :twisted:

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:36 pm**

Arnie 100 and Taalismn pulled open the vault doors ... Every K2 Meter within a 100 mile radius spikes.

SRoss: "Ok, Edwards, Kyle, this is the storage for the Defense Against Dark Arts class. We want you to catalog every item in here."

Arnie 100: "Oh, while your at it, see if you can find Karno and Grel. I sent them to do this job a week ago and haven't heard from them since."

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:12 pm**

Arnie100: "Oh, yeah...safety equipment's being used by another class...sorry. You'll have to make do."
Edwards: :frazz:

"In THERE?!"
Kyle: "With no safety equipment?" :eek:

Edwards: "I can't believe we're in high school again!!"
Kyle: "This is all YOUR fault!"

Posted: **Fri Mar 25, 2016 7:39 pm**

SRoss wrote:Arnie 100 and Taalismn pulled open the vault doors ... Every K2 Meter within a 100 mile radius spikes.

SRoss: "Ok, Edwards, Kyle, this is the storage for the Defense Against Dark Arts class. We want you to catalog every item in here."

Arnie 100: "Oh, while your at it, see if you can find Karno and Grel. I sent them to do this job a week ago and haven't heard from them since."

Grel: "I called in some guys calling themselves the 'Red Snakes' to do it for me...Hey, I'm a businessman now, I can't afford to take time away from my work. Besides, they seemed eager to get inside the vault. Not afraid to get their hands dirty. I almost felt sorry about telling them that it was an internship program and they weren't getting paid for their work. But hey, youthful enthusiasm and all that, ain't it wonderful?"

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 12:05 pm**

Kyle: "Hey! New age metal sculptures!"

Edwards: "I think those were motorcycles."

Kyle: "Why so paranoid?"

Edwards: "You noticed the way they locked, sealed and triple warded the doors behind us?"

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 2:37 pm**

(Suddenly Kyle and Edwards hear a low moaning and a slow shuffling of feet as a horde of zombies move slowly towards them...)
Kyle and Edwards: :eek:

Zombie: "BBBBBBBRRRRRRRRAAAIIINNNSSS..." (Suddenly stops and sniffs both Edwards and Kyle...gives them both the finger and motions the other zombies to follow him back down the corridor...)
Kyle: "HHEEEYYY!!! COME BACK HERE!! I'VE GOT A BRAIN!!!"

Edwards:

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 7:47 pm**

"It disturbs me how easily Miss LaBelle stole that Hovertank. How'd she learn to drive one?"
"This school has a very good Driver's Ed program. And we are considered , after all, a military preparatory school."
"You offer courses on operating HOVERTANKS?!"
"No, we offer instruction on teenage 'jacking mecha and other vehicles, an act which has a fine tradition in anime."

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 8:00 pm**

taalismn wrote:"It disturbs me how easily Miss LaBelle stole that Hovertank. How'd she learn to drive one?"
"This school has a very good Driver's Ed program. And we are considered , after all, a military preparatory school."
"You offer courses on operating HOVERTANKS?!"
"No, we offer instruction on teenage 'jacking mecha and other vehicles, an act which has a fine tradition in anime."

"Because as we all know, only EMO children can properly operate mecha."

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 8:00 pm**

"And who first started that program?"
"I believe that was Edwards..."
"Oh...he and Kyle are right where they belong then."

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 8:57 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:"Oh...he and Kyle are right where they belong then."

"Right behind the 'mech during the backing up lesson."

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 9:30 pm**

"Backing up lesson? What backing up lesson?"
:shock:

"I think I'll get whoever's in the infirmary..." :twisted:

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 9:55 pm**

Washuu: "For my latest project I've transplanted a baboon's brain into Kyle's body."

"Isn't that being cruel, to the baboon?"

Posted: **Sat Mar 26, 2016 11:15 pm**

"Only if the baboon got Kyle's brain... :shock:

...should we put the baboon out of its misery?"

Posted: **Sun Mar 27, 2016 5:17 am**

taalismn wrote:"It disturbs me how easily Miss LaBelle stole that Hovertank. How'd she learn to drive one?"
"This school has a very good Driver's Ed program. And we are considered , after all, a military preparatory school."
"You offer courses on operating HOVERTANKS?!"
"No, we offer instruction on teenage 'jacking mecha and other vehicles, an act which has a fine tradition in anime."

"Really? And here I thought that sort of thing was taught in the Home Economics courses under 'Supply and Procurement'. Which is, indeed, a fine, long-standing military tradition."

Posted: **Sun Mar 27, 2016 2:22 pm**

"Supply and Procurement are much more acceptable terms then 'Pillaging' and 'Looting'."

Posted: **Sun Mar 27, 2016 3:34 pm**

Arnie100 wrote:"Supply and Procurement are much more acceptable terms then 'Pillaging' and 'Looting'."

"The best part is the teachers in that class work for SPAM."

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Monument City Highschool #69(open humor thread)

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