Weapons that should be attached to a Reapers Motorcycle

[Teltum]

Being a motorcycle rider. Fixing anything to your bike that will ever strike anything and not break away is a REALLY bad idea.

I will say that anything you attach would have to be mounted behind the handle bars and likely to the frame.

If piercing zeds is your shtick some dangers that I'll warn you of:

1) Handle Bars are how you drive at under 5-10 MPH. You need 'em and you will use 'em for steering during melee combat. Simple physics here, the bike is not going fast enough to right it self. So mounting something heavy to the bars is a great way to get a -20% to low speed maneuvers. Plus if a zed gets stuck it makes for a hell of a time steering with 200lbs of meat hanging 6 feet off your bars. You can not apply enough torque to turn the bike effectively and you WILL dump it, at a stop if you are very lucky.

1b) If that clasp loosens; that lance is coming back at you and possibly going though something squishy that will kill you 5 mins later.(pierced lung, heart, stomach, ect) Not to mention infection being an issue here.

2) Centripetal force is your worst enemy when you mount a spud bar on the frame it will have to go out at an angle (see: awesome looking motorcycle kill spike). When hitting a zed at low enough speed to just go through them you will have the bike high side, spilling you in the bikes prior direction of travel with the bike landing on top of you moment later possably kill spike side down. see: http://www.break.com/usercontent/2007/2/Motorcycle-HighSide-229314.html @ 40 seconds (Not fatal but painful in that case due to a helmet and proper riding gear) That will happen to your 500lb bike striking a 150lb zombie.(I ride an 1100cc cruiser style that is about 600 lbs, sportsters are around 500 and fat boys are about 750 this is all curb weight but your in combat so you are not riding with an extra 30 gallons of fuel the more weight the more likely you will not lose control of the bike and high side)

2b) The best deal in this is going 25+ MPH which will maybe cut the zeds in half or kill you on impact if your are thrown because you miss-guess the weight. In reality a car is much safer to do this on with a spud bar sticking out the side affixed to the frame.

If you still dig jousting, which I think is where you are going. Grab an 6-8' bit of pipe 2x4 ect and do it the way the knights kinda did. They would hold in the right hand crossing their body to a rider on their left. You will only be able to ram that pipe through zeds on your right as the old school lances were expected to splinter and bad ass new school pipe will only drag you off your bike. Possibly breaking your back if you have the sissy bar.

As per a chainsaw: Yes it is AWESOME, however, it should *never* be mounted to your bike. The spinning will upset the gyroscopic forces stabilizing your motorcycle forcing you to drive with both hands on the handle bars. Not allowing you to fire weapons or swing that sweet machete.

Sorry to bring the somewhat grimm reality of riding a motorcycle into an awesome concept but I have seen a good number of accidents and understand the physics that drive them. I have completed the motorcycle safety foundation course and own several books on safe riding and improving riding, I also placed in my regional physics competition in high school.

My suggestion to all riders in a dead walking scenario is to make your bike hard for the zeds to hold. If they can't grab it all they can do is hit you and the bike can take that all day long. Also make your hand held weapons easy to grab a hold of while riding. Worst case with hand held weapons is you are going to fast or hit something that you did not expect and lose the weapon and hurt your hand, maybe hyper-extend your elbow or a full on break if way too fast.

Well I hope that what I presented explains the dangers of ramming anything with a "hard part" of a motorcycle. Please note: What I presented is just what I can think of, there are far more dangers than I can list personally. I can however say, with out a doubt, 100% is: it is extremely dangerous, and in my opinion way too risky to only kill 1-2 zeds unless you are trying to die in a blaze of glory from blood loss and blunt force trauma. When the motorcycle lands on you pushing you into the asphalt grinding the leather from your skin then the skin from your bones leaving you to die alone from blood loss and surrounded by zombies. All I can say is hopefully you are unconscious.

[Teltum]

I looked for some pictures of what happens in a high side with out a helmet and "race quality" gear. I found them and I will say, "high sides still scare me more than a zombie ever could."

[J. Lionheart]

In response to the subject line question, inquiring what weapons should be attached to a motorcycle, the answer is NONE! Emphatically NONE. Teltum beat me to it, with far more detailed information than I ever could provide, about what happens on a motorcycle, so I'll contribute some bits about cavalry charges and horseback fighting.

If you take a look at a cavalry saber, and compare it to something like an army saber, you'll notice it is highly curved. This has nothing to do with looks, and everything to do with the problems of impact at speed. The cavalry saber is curved to allow it to roll off of its targets during a charge, as it made a passing slash. The worst possible thing would be for it to impale the target, which would result in either losing the weapon, losing your arm, being ejected backwards from your mount, or quite possibly all three. As for knights jousting, or more modern "lancers" charging, what you'll find is that the lance was either a break-away, as Teltum mentioned (the real goal was to unhorse your opponent, not stick them), or was essentially a long spear that was either thrown, or released immediately upon impact to avoid killing the wielder. The real fighting was then done with swords, up close and personal.

The only thing I could even remotely imagine afixing to a motorcycle without grave consequences would be a ranged weapon, such as a crossbow or shotgun, but even then you're playing with fire. The weapon is less usable (can't aim well), and the recoil/release of tension could mess with your steering pretty badly. You'd be far better off just firing with the weapon in your hand, and using the bike for what it's intended - transport.

[Kelorin]

So, just to be clear: Don't try this: (More specifically at time 2:07)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZs8F0x604Y