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Gloomy mood

Posted: Wed Dec 01, 2010 3:27 pm
by Kevin
Gloomy mood

I don’t know why, but I’ve been in a gloomy mood the past week or two. It’s not a constant state. I’ll bounce up and be positive for a few hours, slide into gloom for a while, bounce back up, and slide back down. But I’ve been gloomy enough that several people have taken notice and asked if I’m doing okay. I am. I've just been low energy and not my usual positive self.

Part of it, of course, is my missing my father. My brother noted that it’s not even two months yet since he died, and with the holidays, his absence is all the more felt.

Part of it is I feel like I’m not going fast enough on Armageddon Unlimited™. I hate it when I can’t kick my editing and writing into high gear. It’s a great book and you’ll love it, I’m enjoying working on it, but getting pages ready for final editing has been a slow grind for some reason.

Then there’s the juggling of bills and a thousand things that need to be done or dealt with above and beyond the creativity of writing.

Concerns about the economy aren’t helping. I know sales at Palladium remain soft and continue to bounce up and down, though that’s largely due to a lack of new product (which creates this vicious circle of frustration for me). Furthermore, in the Detroit area, it seems like every time I turn around someone I know is losing their home, afraid they’ll lose their job, praying for unemployment extensions, or struggling to make ends meet. It’s rough and the media doesn’t paint a pretty picture.

Hmmm, the media – the media are like schizophrenic doomsday prophets, aren’t they? “Oh, things are awful.” “No, things are looking up.” “Oh, but this or that is down, be afraid.” “Yes, but this or that other thing is promising, so be guardedly optimistic.” “Employment is down.” “Employment is up.” “Be afraid.” “Don’t be afraid, at least not too much.” Gaaaaaahhhh, it's maddening.

On top of everything else, the weather’s turned winter cold in Michigan, it is snow flurrying outside, and I want to go home and sleep for a week, but then Armageddon Unlimited™ and all those other books will be even later, and I hate disappointing people.

It’s all so frustrating at times. I’m sure you’ve felt like this too. It stinks.

Oh well, it’s the ups and downs, trials and tribulations, of life. All we can do is make the best of it and not get lost in the negative. That’s what I am doing, and I hope you are too.

As stressful as the holidays can be, it’s also a wonderful time of year. I love giving out gifts and doing little things to make people smile and feel better.

Gotta kick the negativity out the door and think positive.

Heck, I have a truckload of things to be thankful about, starting with the Palladium crew (including freelancers) – what a great group of people. You have no idea how awesome most of these guys and gals truly are.

We have a bunch of great books in the pipeline and many more on the drawing board. We’ll get ‘em done and they’ll be great stuff. I have a zillion ideas for new books and products. Not just ideas, but exciting ideas that when I reveal them to a few insiders, the response is, “Oh wow.”

I hope to announce some surprises next year and I hope Palladium gets back on its feet once and for all. I have big plans for Palladium’s future and I’m going to shake things up and make things happen starting next year. I’m tired of the gloom and doom, and I’m going to try to do something about it. Ah, there’s the positive energy swinging back up. ;)

Thanks for listening to me vent. Stay positive and hang in there. Keep the faith and be good to yourselves.

Sincerely,
Kevin Siembieda

© Copyright December 1, 2010 Palladium Books Inc. All rights reserved.

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